Taking the House by Storm

Watermelon Mint Ice Cream

2011-05-27T17:44:00.003-04:00

I just love watermelon and I love buying a whole one, especially when they're out in abundance at my local warehouse store. Unfortunately, though, the Rickster and I can't eat it fast enough before it gets all clear. So this go round, I got creative and made some Watermelon Mint Ice Cream (as well as Watermelon Mojitos) to use it up.

Watermelon and mint – two of my favorite things – come together in this refreshing, unique recipe. I love the fact that the cream used in this recipe is naturally infused with mint - to smell it was heavenly; I'll definitely use that technique for future mint ice creams. And because I believe chocolate makes everything better, I added in some mini morsels toward the end. Next time I'll use full-sized chips. Yum.

But don't do like I did and use half and half in order to save a few calories; it was a little icy. Next time, I'll definitely go with the full on cream. Also, I think I overfilled my machine. The next day when I was making the leftover mix, that batch was much creamier. So check your machine before pouring it in. And enjoy!

Drying Strawberries - Literally

2010-07-30T22:15:00.003-04:00

Just saw this idea from America's Test Kitchen on how to dry your strawberries after washing them without bruising them: put them in your salad spinner, along with a few paper towels on the bottom. I can't help but thing that quick spinning motion would have to do some harm, but I'm willing to give it a try. Check out their video.

Fool Proof Sweet Tea

2010-01-05T22:15:00.003-05:00

For whatever reason, whenever I've made sweet tea in the past, it has sucked. My mom has told me several times how she makes it (which I enjoy - she includes lemon, a must for me), but I've never recreated it successfully. Plus, I've bought those gigantic family sized tea bags, thinking one of those was two of the other ones and that has never worked out just right.

On New Year's Day, we had my dear husband's family over for a belated Christmas celebration - we spent the actual holiday with my folks. My step-father-in-law likes his sweet tea, so I wanted to make some he wouldn't have to choke down just to be polite. Found this recipe for Smooth Sweet Tea on All Recipes and it was mighty tasty. Not sure if it's because of the recommended pinch of baking soda that supposedly prevents a bitter taste (my tea was definitely not bitter) or because, thanks to reviewer Heather, I used one family sized bag for every three tea bags called for.

Either way, it was a big hit. And while it doesn't call for lemon (I don't think the in-laws would approve), I was able to squeeze some in my own glass for the perfect mix. Next time, I might cut down on the sugar a bit, but really, just dandy as is.

Firstarters

2009-11-29T22:15:00.002-05:00

If you have a wood burning fireplace or like to camp, you may find these neat little firestarters useful, and cheap to make. Besides, what else were you going to do with all that dryer lint? Thanks to the folks at FlyLady.net for sharing.

Give Leftover Mashed Potatoes New Life

2009-11-28T13:17:00.004-05:00

I love mashed potatoes. Generally speaking, when I go to a restaurant, a big part of my entree choice depends on whether or not mashed potatoes are involved. Sometimes, I even request them as a substitute for whatever inferior selection they've already made for me (I know chefs love that!). And when I order my favorite dish of all, eggplant Parmesean, at a place that has mashed potatoes, I ask for them instead of spaghetti, with the marinara. Mmmmm. Don't knock it til you try it.

Anyway, that being said, sometimes it will come to pass that, in my zeal for ensuring we have enough mashed potatoes with certain meals, I'll over prepare these fluffy, delightful treats. Throwing them away would be out of the question, though sometimes that has come to pass, I'm ashamed to say. But in the past week, I've made two delightful dishes with leftover mashed potatoes that turns them into a whole new meal.

While I'd heard of making potato soup out of left over mashed potatoes, I just tried it for the first time. It turned out really good. I didn't use mushrooms (Rick doesn't like 'em), and I used dried chives instead of scallions, and I substituted regular old one percent milk for the half-and-half.

Today, I made Mashed Potato Quesadillas from a recipe I just got in an allrecipes newsletter. Yummy! Again, I didn't have green onions, so I just used dried chives. And I didn't measure anything - just guessed at what I'd need to make enough for one (2 slices of bacon, etc.). Enjoyed this delicacy with salsa and sour cream on the side - tasty!

So next time you have leftover mashed potatoes, give them new life with one of these recipes.

Amen, FlyLady Kelly

2009-11-23T19:22:00.005-05:00

In one of the bazillion emails I received today from my friends over at FlyLady.net, the sage words of advice below were found. While I'm not hosting Thanksgiving this year (or any, thus far), she was talking directly to me because that's how I generally operate whenever I host an event at my house. Check it out and see if she's talking to you. If so, heed her words: she may just be an angel sent to save your sanity.

Dear Friends:

It is time for another Holiday Reality Check!! During this time of
year when we are all running around trying to make this the most
perfect and best Holiday ever, we lose a sense of reality and start
drowning in perfectionism! Even when we promise ourselves it won't
happen this year!

The subject of today's Holiday Reality Check is about Thanksgiving
Dinner. Now there may be some of you that don't prepare a
Thanksgiving meal but trust me you can still relate to this subject
even if you are not celebrating Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving Dinner..... ahhh the Turkey will be golden and juicy, we
will obsess about it being just right! The stuffing will be perfectly
cooked, not soggy or overdone. The mashed potatoes will be creamy and
light, no lumps allowed. Our tables will be set with our best dishes
and oh wait, candles... yes candles. Mental note: have to go buy
candles. If the dining room is flanked in candlelight then no one
will notice the stain on the carpet or the crack in the wall. Hmmm
maybe I should paint that wall. It is only one wall with a crack, so
maybe if I paint that wall in a complimentary color, I won't have to
paint all the walls. OH! If I paint the wall a soft cream, I could
get a new valance for the window. Ay yi yi the window, it really
needs to be cleaned. I guess I need to clean that first. STOP!!!
HALT!! Put the brakes on! Ok, what you just read was how a SHE mind
thinks. We start off thinking about what we want for our dinner and
then somewhere we take a left turn and just keep on going. Before you
know it, it will be the night before your grand dinner and you will be
on a ladder painting the dining room!!! You will be standing on a
ladder with hungry kids, a husband that is shaking his head wondering
why this has to be done now and then it will hit you!! OH NO! The
turkey is still in the freezer!

DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN!!

Let me give it to you straight right here and now! There are three
more days before Thanksgiving, the only thing you need to focus on now
is making sure you have all of the groceries you need and getting your
home ready as in company ready NOT REDECORATING!! If you have not
done it by now, it is time to let it go and focus on what is truly
important. Gathering your loved ones around you and enjoying the
holiday together with good food and good company. Look around you...
if you think that you are not ready for your guests to come and visit
your home on Thursday then go to www.FlyLady.net , go to the table of
contents and click on the link for Crisis Cleaning. Check your
pantry, freezer and refrigerator BEFORE you go to the grocery store.
Do not try and mentally challenge yourself into a brain freeze trying
to remember if you have cornstarch at home. Write down what you need
to complete your shopping and get it done before Wednesday. Do not
attempt to go to the grocery store Wednesday night before Thanksgiving
and get caught in the crowds with all those people that will certainly
have lost their sense of humor and holiday cheer.

Do not look forward to a perfect day, look forward to a FLYing
Thanksgiving!

Love,
Kelly

Watch Out for Deadly Comet

2009-11-06T21:26:00.005-05:00

If you haven't already heard of EWG.org, it's a website sponsored by the Environmental Working Group. They do studies and perform tests on a myriad of consumable products in order to gauge those products' toxicity. While I'm not religious about utilizing the site, I have checked out children's sunscreen and various cosmetics. I think you'd be surprised to see how many of the products you use are chockful of harmful chemicals. I know I was a little shocked at the levels in my Origins products considering that particular line is supposedly natural. But that's a topic for another day.

Since I'm on EWG's email list, I get periodic notices alerting me to the dangers of some product or another. Today's email's subject was regarding cleaning supplies that may be used at home or in schools. EWG tested some popular and some green cleaning supplies for safety and Comet, which is at this very moment sitting under my kitchen sink, was the worst of the worst.

Which is saying something since, according to EWG, "nearly any chemical can legally be used in cleaners, and ingredient lists are not required on labels."

Comet was found to release 143 air contaminants into the air and contain 7 chemicals that may cause cancer. And I thought it was just good for scrubbing my kitchen sink. Which goes to prove that while ignorance is bliss, it could also potentially kill you.

Suffice it to say, I immediately became interested in some more green ways to clean my sink and found a lot of great resources thanks to Mom Go Green. According to a commenter on the site, you can simply use baking soda and water. Another person provided this link to a printable fold-out card full of green cleaning ideas (you have to scroll down a bit to the Household Cleaners section). EarthEasy has a lot of great ideas for making your own cleaning products for less while EWG offers some practical tips for cleaning more safely in your home.

One of my favorite cleaning gurus, Linda Cobb, the Queen of Clean, has always promoted the use of such simple, safe household products like baking soda and vinegar to clean. And my friend, Christine, uses vinegar to clean everything, including dusting the furniture. It smells like eggs at first, but it does fade. In addition to being safer, these things are a lot cheaper than the more dangeous options out there. So it's better for you all around.

Whoops – I'm a Moron

2009-11-06T13:10:00.003-05:00

No surprise there. But I was wrong about getting dumped from Working Moms Against Guilt's blogroll – turns out I was never on it (insert nervous chuckle here). I'm listed as one of their friends (and hopefully I'll stay there if they forgive my dopiness). I kind of thought that's where I was, but didn't see that list on the right. Turns out it's on the left. Whoops. That's what I get for keeping up with the blog via FeedBlitz – no longer familiar with the layout.

But all things considered, I'm kind of glad I thought I got the boot because, if all goes well, it'll have lit a fire under my butt to get off it and get this blog going.

Thanks again, WMAG, for all your support. Even if I am a moron.

If You Want Something Done...

2009-11-03T00:01:00.003-05:00

Forget "right". There are just a gazallion things around this house that need doing one way or another. Here's an example: After over a year of waiting for my dear husband, Rick, to put the hardware back on our windows, I finally finished the last one tonight – at which time it occurred to me that anyone could have come in through it at any time. Not a great feeling.

I also finally cleaned paint off the windows the a fore to mentioned husband also was going to take care of. It kind of made me laugh to find out that, after all this time, the biggest splotches were actually dry wall mud which wiped off fairly easily; I had been holding out for more Goof Off, which I finally picked up last week.

Speaking of Goof Off, I found its warning label a little unsettling: This product contains chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer and birth defects or other reproductive harm. Nice, eh? There were more, but I won't get into them. I will say that if you're a huffer, I'd avoid experimenting with this one.

I've used this, I guess you'd call it, poison before but must not have read the label because I don't think I would have loved it so much I'd want to bring this highly dangerous substance into my home again. On the other hand, when using it tonight, I didn't wear gloves at first, which is asinine considering we have two ginormous boxes from Sam's Club down in our basement thanks to my Dad's warnings during the Avian Flu scare of 2007, I believe it was.

But enough doom and gloom. Back to how totally awesome I am.

As I sit here typing this, still a little heady from the Goof Off fumes (should have opened the doors) and a little stinky from lack of a shower thus far (though it is still on tonight's agenda), my sink is shiny. My front porch is also pretty swank, thanks to following Fly Lady's mission for today. I even cleaned our porch light glass of bugs.

Plus, I finally threw away the grout bag Rick left laying (or is it lying?) in our landscaping, which made me sad because it was so awesome and also because I'll have to buy another one for the couple of grout lines that were missed in our kitchen remodel (a year ago – I can't begin to tell you how long my To Do list is).

Additionally, I cleaned out a cooler full of slimy water, ruined condiments and various beverages that someone, eh hem, left out on the porch for like the third time in a row. You owe me, sweetheart.

All in all, I had a full, productive day. I'm beat. So I guess I'll go grab that shower and wait for my canonization.

Fifteen Minute Friday Night

2009-10-31T00:24:00.003-04:00

One of the Fly Lady's mantras is you can do anything for 15 minutes. Tonight, I put it into practice while baking some of my Schwan's Monster Mania Cookies. The cookies are supposed to bake for 19-20 minutes, but I burnt them the first time I believe due to the fact that I used the small, upper over of my double range oven – very close quarters. So I figured I'd try 15 minutes and I set the timer. Then it hit me:

I should spend those 15 minutes cleaning out my freezer since some stuff fell out (not for the first time) when I went to find the cookies.

It's not very easy to tell the difference between the before and after pictures, but believe you me, it's there. Like items are grouped together, the interior has been wiped down and I tossed out some leftover smoothies - FYI, they don't defrost well.

So even though it's kind of a lame thing to do on a Friday night, it's one thing off my usually ever-growing To Do list, which is definitely a (baby) step in the right direction.

CHAOS Central

2009-10-29T23:55:00.004-04:00

So I mentioned the fact that I just started following FlyLady.net to try and help me get a handle on the condition of my home. I'm an admitted victim of CHAOS, her term for Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome. It is so true and I was reminded of it again today when I unexpectedly dropped in on my friend, Sylvia.

She had no idea Ian and I were stopping by because her phone went right to voice mail and that red blinking light didn't pique her interest enough to listen to the message. A normal person probably wouldn't have just charged on over there anyway, but I felt pretty sure she'd be home.

What astounded me when we get there, though, was how clean her house was – and she's recovering from 2 knee replacement surgeries.

She's not the only person I know who keeps a house like this. I just have no idea in the world how she/they does/do it. They may as well be speaking another language that's how foreign the whole concept is to me.

That isn't to say I don't aspire to be like that, I just have no idea how. Hopefully, that will all soon change.

To demonstrate how I'm the polar opposite of Sylvia and others like her, I'll relay this story from last week. It was my turn to host the monthly Girls' Night and I was serving pumpkin soup, meatloaf and mashed potatoes. I made the soup the day before (good thing, because it took me 3 hours just to get the meat out of the pumpkins) and really felt like I was cleaning as I went the day of when making the other items. And really, it doesn't sound like I was making all that much.

But when my friends started to arrive, my kitchen was a complete and total disaster. I should have taken a picture of it...

I could tell my friend, Suzi, was having a hard time wrapping her head around how it even got that way. She was just dying to figure out a way to get it all under control. I felt bad for her, and me. Why am I like this? What can I do to change it? Here's hoping the answers come quickly because I am seriously getting overwhelmed and stressed out by the way things currently are.

Mashed Faux-tatoes

2009-10-27T23:33:00.003-04:00

Tonight's dinner was revolving around meatloaf again. I'd bought enough ingredients a week ago for a double batch, finally remembered to fire up the second batch on Saturday and froze most of it, but kept two mini loaves out. Ate the first one Sunday and figured I'd make the second tonight.

Long story long, my philosophy has always been: what's a meatloaf without mashed potatoes? Sadly, we were about to find out. Used the last of my taters on Sunday and forgot that I meant to hit the weekly farm sale up at the church Monday afternoon.

What I did remember is that I'd heard somewhere you could mash cauliflower and it taste almost like the real thing. As luck would have it, we had a head in the crisper, so I figured I'd give it a try. I'd always wanted to. After reading a bunch of different recipes, I decided to just wing it using some of the ingredients I'd read and see what happened.

I started out by steaming the cauliflower until tender. After draining, I returned the florets to the hot pot, added a few slices of butter and creamed with a hand mixer. Right away, I knew this little experiment was not going to turn out anything like real mashed potatoes, but I was committed, so carried on. I added a little milk, salt, pepper, onion powder, garlic powder, white pepper, about an ounce of cream cheese and shredded parm.

The end product was a'right. After thinking about it, I decided I didn't like the taste of the parm. Rick said he thought that was the only thing really giving it flavor. He also said it was very different, but not bad, just different. Ian ate it, so I guess that says something positive.

I suppose if I ever make it again, I may try the Ruby Tuesday recipe that's floating around the internet. Not sure if it's the real deal, nor have I ever had theirs, that I know of, but it seems to get high praise. And I'd try to mashing it all up in the food processor as some recipes suggested to see if I could get a smoother consistency. Anyone else out there ever tried making mashed cauliflower? If so, what did you think?

My Sink Is Officially Shiny

2009-10-26T22:06:00.006-04:00

After about 5 hours in the works (including about a 2 hour hiatus for an exercise class and lunch), my sink is officially shiny, the first order of business for a person who's making the commitment to join the Fly Lady in a quest for cleanliness, order and peace of mind. So I guess this makes me an official FlyBaby (someone who aspires to be as awesomely clean and organized as the Fly Lady herself).

Please follow the link above for more detailed instructions, but basically, shining your sink entails filling up one side at a time with hot water (which seemed like a collosal waste of water, but you supposedly only need to do this once), adding a cup of bleach (don't pour it in while the sink is filling up like I did; the closer the water level gets to the rim, the more splashing occurs) and letting it sit for an hour.

Fly Lady says you can use tongs to get the stopper out – did not come close to working for me – or manually remove some of the water so you can stick your gloved hand in to pull the plug. Once the water is drained, rinse well. If you have a stainless steel sink like mine, she recommends scrubbing it down with a scouring pad, then rinsing well.

Everybody then uses Ajax or Comet or something similar to clean out the sink next. From my own personal experience, I'd suggest finishing the bleach portion of the exercise on both sides before moving to the next step on either side. Trust me on this.

After the scouring, rinse thoroughly. Be sure to clean other areas of the sink at this time, too, like the faucet, around the basin, etc. Once all that's rinsed off, spray the tub(s) of your sink with Windex or some similar glass cleaner to shine it up. I'm the type that needs super explicit instructions at every step of the way, which aren't always available, so I imagine it's okay to spray it on top of the water that's leftover from the rinsing (though I'd really love to know for sure, Fly Lady).

The final step is drying your sink out, which you're also supposed to do every time you use your sink. You're supposed to keep a clean dishtowel handy every day for this express purpose. Seems kind of silly, but it sure does look nice. I hope I keep it up because I could see how this one simple thing could help keep you motivated throughout the house.

According to the Fly Lady, you should shine your sink every night before you go to bed as part of your nighttime routine. As I mentioned earlier, you don't need to do the whole fill the sink with water and bleach, scour, scrub, etc. My impression is you just spray it with windex and dry it after you've gotten all your dish washing and drying done. That way, a shiny clean sink greets you in the morning and gets your day off to a good start. What I'm not sure of is whether or not you wipe the window cleaner off with the same towel you dry the water with. Details, people, I need 'em.

Anyway, by looking at my before and after pix, you have to admit, it is quite the dramatic effect. The real test will be to see if we can (all) keep it that way.

Fast Food, For Your Freezer

2009-10-26T21:34:00.003-04:00

I'd never heard of Schwan's until my friend, Kimbie, sent an email letting a bunch of her gal pals know that the home delivery food service company was offering a free $9.99 meal to new customers. (My apologies to my other gal pals to whom I failed to forward this message – didn't cross my mind, I'm afraid.)

As I'm not one to pass up a free meal, and I have a penchant for trying new things, not to mention a deep-seated pleasure in spending my sweetie's hard-earned money, I decided to give it a try. Based on suggestions from other gals in Kimbie's group, I opted for the Tamales, though I didn't stop there.

Why not try some other things, I reasoned. Delivery was no cost, and I had that $10 that I'd saved to spend. So I also ordered Fiesta Lime Chicken, which we had tonight, and Monster Mania frozen cookie dough.

After a few botched delivery attempts/miscommunication between parties, our food finally arrived about two weeks ago, about 6 weeks after placing my initial order. (Schwan's delivers to your area on the same day every two weeks.)

Upon checking out the goods, I was disappointed in the size of the tamales portion, though rereading the description just now, I see they tell you up front there are only 6 in the bag, and supposedly you can feed 6 people on those. That remains to be seen, but I'll let you know.

We fired up some of the Monster cookies right away, and they were, as expected, tasty. Unfortunately, I think they got overcooked in the top part of my double range oven. I always defer to that smaller area for time/energy/money savings, but I'm starting to think it's not the best place for the more delicate items I prepare.

Tonight, I made the Lime Chicken. It was tasty but, in my opinion, too small a serving. Even though it was advertised as a 2-person meal, I still think there could have been more food to share and it was kind of short on chicken. We'll see what happens with those Tamales, but as of now, I'm not too sold on the concept.

In spite of the delivery issues, the customer service has been great. And the food has been good. But the items are a little pricey for the amount you get. I know I have to consider the fact that it's all delivered straight to my door, but I feel like, with a little more effort, I get more value out of a Dream Dinners type of establishment. I'll probably wait for the next big offer before trying it again.

Anyone else ever used it? What are your thoughts?

I Finally Did It

2009-10-25T23:00:00.003-04:00

After years of actively avoiding it, I finally signed up for FlyLady.net today. My BFF, Angie, told me about her a long time ago but, quite frankly, I was afraid to. I'd heard it was a lot of work and a real commitment. Not exactly up my alley. But with the state of affairs around my house of late, and the fact I've started to itch all over my body (related? possibly...), I decided it was time to check it out.

Basically, it's a free 'service' that is designed to help you overcome CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) and live a happier, neater life.

What really got me was this little intro on the home page: "Do you feel overwhelmed, overextended, and overdrawn? Hopeless and you don't know where to start? Don't worry friend, we've been there, too."

Hallelujah, sounds like home-making salvation is waiting for me in the form of Fly Lady, a woman by the name of Marla Cilley who hails from the great state of North Carolina.

So far, I've spent a couple of hours today trolling around the site and checking out all the wares she's hawking (there's probably at least $100 worth of stuff I'm ready to buy right now) rather than actually getting any real cleaning done, like I had planned. So technically, I've regressed since joining. But I have faith that tomorrow will indeed be another, more successful, day. I at least hope to shine my sink, which is the first step in learning how to FLY (finally love yourself - catchy, eh?).

Ultimately, I pray that, in the coming weeks, I'll have made some progress and be able to testify to you about this wonderful program. Don't worry, this won't turn into the daily Fly Lady blog; that idea's already been taken. But I do hope that I find it's something that can work for me and maybe, you, too. Wish me luck.

It's 5:06.

2009-09-11T17:06:00.003-04:00

For all intents and purposes, it's 2 hours later. The floor is drying. In some areas, I cleaned a little deeper than I should have (like cleaning out the toaster and getting wax out of an old candle holder). In other areas, wanted to go deeper (move the oven and clean under there, wipe down fridge)), but didn't...yet. Once the floor dries, I'll have to 're-set' the kitchen. Then I'll share my progress.

An Experiment

2009-09-11T14:56:00.004-04:00

My house is a mess, nothing unusual there. I really have been wanting to clean up, but I've been sick the past week, so I've mostly just been maintaining. My husband's bureau is sparkly clean, but he hasn't even noticed or just didn't bother saying anything. Thanks, honey. But I digress.

Today's project, thanks in part to Peter Walsh and him continuously referencing 18 minutes as a great time frame for decluttering in his book Does this Clutter Make My Butt Look Fat? (which I recently picked up at the library), involves me cleaning up my kitchen. I've been trying unsuccessfully to have it look presentable all week. I truly do believe I have some sort of mental block against getting organize. I look at a mess like this (found in virtually every room in my house) and it seems impossible. I don't know where to start, how to honestly get rid of the stuff and not just move it somewhere else. It's very daunting.

So here we are at 3:02 on Friday afternoon. Obviously, it will be a little later after I post this, but basically the drill involves me getting off the computer, setting the kitchen timer for 18 minutes and seeing if I can rid my kitchen of this mess.

Let's get started...

Heavenly Brownies

2009-09-05T21:53:00.004-04:00

Instead of trying to make a dent in the clutter around my house while my son napped this afternoon, I decided to declutter my hotmail inbox. In so doing, I spent a little quality time in a newsletter from AllRecipes and discovered Mmm-Mmm Better Brownies. They seemed easy enough, so I decided to make them after dinner tonight.

Holy cow! I'm in the middle of my second square hot out of the oven and I can't get over how delicious (and easy to prepare) they are. After following the directions to the T (including walnuts), I added mini chocolate chips and drizzled with caramel per some reviewers' suggestions before cooking. I used an 8 x 8 pan and forgot other reviewers had said cooking time would be 30 minutes versus 20. So I wound up checking on them every 5 minutes after the initial timer went off at 20 minutes, and took them out at 32.

Thanks to the engineering geniuses at Kraft, I was able to squirt a generous amount of my beloved Cool Whip from a can onto this delectable treat. Fantastic! And they're easy enough you can justify doing more than just opening a box.

Pictures to come once I find my camera cord.

Don't, I repeat DO NOT, Buy OXO Pop Containers

2009-08-05T15:40:00.004-04:00

I am so pissed right now I can hardly see. Once I tell you why, you may think I'm over-reacting, but I'm okay with that.

Over the course of the past several months, I have purchased a large selection of OXO's fairly new and extremely pricey airtight POP containers that "make it easy to keep your dry food fresh and your kitchen organized". As a matter of fact, upon taking inventory, I've spent approximately $230, not including tax, using a combination of Bed, Bath & Beyond coupons and some Kohl's store credit to buy all the ones currently in my pantry.

That's a lot of cabbage for some storage containers but I figured if they really do keep the food fresh and help me organize my pantry without having a bunch of boxes and unstructured bags fighting for real estate, it may be worth it.

I even encouraged my brother to purchase the 11-piece starter set which costs $99.99. FOR PLASTIC CONTAINERS! But I digress...

My point to you is: don't spend the money. While they do seem to keep our dry goods fresh longer than just rolling down a bag, I've had two of them break. One fell on the counter and I was able to exchange it at Bed, Bath & Beyond because it was fairly new and I still had the receipt and packaging. Another one simply fell off the other one it was stack on in my pantry onto the same shelf.

But I don't have a receipt so I figured I'd call OXO to take advantage of their satisfaction guarantee, which states: We guarantee everything we make! If for any reason you are not satisfied with an OXO product, return it for replacement or refund. Please contact OXO´s customer service department and we will be happy to assist you.

When I told Martha, the customer service rep I was lucky enough to get, what happened, she informed me that the satisfaction guarantee did not cover this particular situation. Excuse me?

These containers are on average $17 a piece. They are meant to be used every day. Yet they are unable to sustain the short 6" fall from atop one another? Are you serious?

Yes, she was. But she was willing to give me (and this part really stuck in my craw) 25% off on the shipping (yes, shipping) of a replacement. Fuck you, Martha. I asked her if I could instead return all the other 14 non-cracked containers I had for a refund. One would think at this point, Martha would have said, "Wait a minute. Let me see what I can do." Instead, she said I could, as a one-time courtesy as if I'd ever buy another thing from OXO. Don't do me any favors, sweetheart.

I wish I had refreshed my memory on the exact verbiage of satisfaction guarantee before I had called or I definitely would have fought harder/asked for her supervisor, etc. I mean, "for any reason" still means any reason, right?

Once I calm down, I may just write a letter to the prez about it and explain to him how big of a customer they'll be losing because they'd rather me send all the pieces back than replace one. But I may just send them all back. If they're that poorly made, who needs 'em.

Going Bananas

2009-07-28T14:26:00.004-04:00

Last week, I had a bunch of bananas on the verge of slipping beyond usable into the trash stage. While I wasn't prepared to just throw them away, I couldn't bear the thought of making (and eating) yet another loaf of banana bread. Don't get me wrong, I like it, but with a small family, it's just too much to eat. I think I still have a couple of mini loaves in the freezer from last time my bananas got away from me.

So I Googled banana ice cream and found this recipe for Chunky Banana Nut Chip Ice Cream. As you can see from the title, it's chock-full of a lot of tasty treats: chocolate, nuts and bananas. It was pretty easy to make. The only thing I really did differently was to use about 3 cups of heavy cream and 1 cup of half and half instead of the full quart of cream. Mainly because I'm cheap and wanted to make another ice cream from allrecipes.com, Blueberry Cheesecake (fabulous – more on this coming soon) and didn't want to buy two quarts of expensive heavy cream.

Some reviewers complained it tasted too banana-y. Personally, I'm not sure how that's even possible. So if you don't really enjoy the taste of bananas, I wouldn't suggest you make this particular ice cream. But if you do, give it a whirl. You won't be disappointed. And a little chocolate sauce on top doesn't hurt it, either.

Note: This pic doesn't do it justice, but it's hard to photograph something so light, so close. And, I'm no food stylist...yet.

Hose Surgery a Rousing Success

2009-07-28T00:04:00.004-04:00

I love talking to my dad. All I have to do is casually mention some problem going on around the house (or really any subject) and he has some insight, advice or information that I can put to good use. For instance, I recently told him that we needed a new hose because the end that attaches to the spigot had gotten run over and I couldn't unbend it.

He informed me that they sell replacements – all you have to do is cut off the old one and attach the new one, called an end fitting. Who knew? I went to Lowe's and sure enough, there were several to choose from, ranging in price from about $1.40 to almost $5. I believe the one I picked up was in the neighborhood of $3. Didn't want to completely cheap out but didn't want to spend so much that I may as well just buy a new hose.

After several weeks (possibly months) after buying the darned thing, I finally got the inspiration I needed to actually put it on yesterday when my two-year-old son, Ian, dropped a quart of paint on our living room rug. Right or wrong, I thought it was a good idea to try to hose it off. That is fodder for another post, another day.

Anyway, I was a little nervous about putting it on because it didn't really come with any instructions and my dad sent me an email last week saying he'd forgotten what a pain it was to do the old switcheroo – apparently, he mowed over his hose for not the first time. I wasn't even sure what I was going to cut the old one off with until I remembered I got Rick a nice utility knife for Christmas. It worked like a charm and really, the whole process went off without much of a hitch.

I had to tighten it up a bit after my first attachment revealed quite a leak, but a few more turns of the screws and voilá! It's like a whole new hose – and it's one less piece of rubber in the old landfill. So I feel good twice for this little home improvement accomplishment.

Orzo, Anyone?

2009-07-26T23:47:00.004-04:00

I've had a bag of orzo in the pantry for a while but never knew what to do with it. Last night, I decided to put it to good use.

I had already planned to make Awesome Baked Sea Scallops, from allrecipes.com, and discovered some people had made orzo as a side dish. So I looked it up and decided on Vegetable Orzo, especially since I magically had most of the ingredients on hand.

Personally, I loved it as is. Other reviewers, and my dear husband Rick, didn't think it had enough flavor but the balsamic vinegar was enough for me. I started to sprinkle Parmesan on it as some other reviewers suggested, then decided I didn't want to over-fatten something that was relatively healthy, especially since those scallops were so heavy. I would definitely make it again, though maybe throw in some herbs and/or spices for the Rickster.

I would not, however, make those scallops again. They just tasted so fattening and it seemed like a shame to bury those expensive, succulent mollusks in a lot of breading, butter and oil. Lots of people loved it, though, so I'm sharing it with you. But it was just too heavy for my taste. And the fact that Rick, who love scallops, hardly touched his confirmed I won't be making it again. But please enjoy my lovely photos of it.

Cool New Turntable

2009-07-26T22:49:00.003-04:00

Check out this neat little two-tiered turntable from OXO. It's 10" and allows you to get more space for your money with adjustable upper levels and an open area for taller bottles. Genius! Wish I hadn't recently bought one of the regular, run-of-the-mill kind.

Corn Chowder

2009-07-26T20:59:00.005-04:00

One of the many perks of being married to my DH is fresh corn every summer. His step-father's family farm and grow the most delicious corn you've ever had in your life. I believe it's called bodacious. I've only had the privilege of helping "put up" corn once in my life, about three years ago. It's a full day of picking (my step-father-in-law generally does all of that), shucking, silking, blanching, icing, cutting it off the cob, bagging and burping it.

It was a lot of fun, a lot of work, and sometimes the grossest thing I've ever done. I'll never forget opening up one ear of corn that was completely engulfed in the blackest, fuzziest mold I've ever seen. The occasional worms didn't bother me nearly as much as that did.

Today, we spent a lazy Sunday afternoon up at the in-laws pool, right next door to one of their corn fields. So right before we left, I picked about 12 ears. It was my first time picking them myself, but my brother-in-law, Scott, gave me this guideline, passed on from my step-father-in-law, Fred: If it's soft, it's not ready. It should feel like a hard-on.

Nice. And to me, it all felt pretty, well, firm. So I wasn't sure what I'd get when we got home. Turns out I'm a pretty decent picker. I had to cut a bug or two out of the tops, but the corn itself was delicious in this restaurant-quality Corn Chowder recipe I got from Tyler Florence on FoodNetwork.com.

Since we don't have any fresh herbs (my garden is pretty much a wash this year), I decided to leave them out and add my own flare as well as take some inspiration from a few reviews. Below is the recipe, or you can click on the link above for the original. Here's what I did differently: skipped the parsley and thyme, added some diced carrots (we had a few left in a 5 lb. bag I got at Costco – never again. I'm glad to finally be rid of them), a few dashes of both Tabasco and red pepper flakes, and about 1/8 tsp. of cayenne. Yummy!

Ingredients

* 2 tablespoons butter
* Extra-virgin olive oil
* 1 onion, diced
* 2 garlic cloves, minced
* 6 sprigs fresh thyme, leaves only
* 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
* 6 cups canned vegetable stock
* 2 cups heavy cream
* 2 Idaho potatoes, peeled and diced
* 6 ears corn
* Salt and freshly ground black pepper
* 1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley leaves

Directions

Heat the butter and 1 tablespoon olive oil in a soup pot over medium heat. Add the onion, garlic, and thyme and cook until the vegetables are good and soft, 8 to 10 minutes. Dust the vegetables with flour and stir to coat everything well. Pour in the vegetable stock and bring to a boil. Add the cream and the potatoes, bring to a boil and boil hard for about 7 minutes, until the potatoes break down (this will help to thicken the soup and give it a good texture).

Cut the corn kernels off the cob and add to the soup. Season with salt and pepper and simmer until the corn is soft, about 10 to 12 minutes. Stir in the parsley and give it another little drink of olive oil. Ladle the soup into bowls and serve.

My First Dowel Job

2009-07-17T23:43:00.006-04:00

So I decided I wanted to make a 3D SpongeBob cake for my son, Ian's, second birthday. He loves that little yellow dude and I love a challenge. Especially one that will make me insane and stressed out down to the minute. And did this cake deliver.

My mother-in-law was kind enough to allow me to bring all my cake decorating supplies over to her house (where we were having the party) the day before so I could assemble it there and not worry about transporting it. (Thank goodness because I shudder to think what would have happened if we had to drive it 30 minutes to her house.)

Ian was in a summer camp that week, and he was in school from 9-12. My plan was to pick up the rest of the last minute supplies I needed, then pack up the car in time to pick him up and head north. Magically, I had it all in the car (and I mean that car was packed full) with literally a minute to spare before I had to go pick him up. As I was locking the door to my house, congratulating myself on getting 'er did, I thought, "This is too good to be true. Something is going to go awry."

And awry it did go. After picking Ian up, hitting two different Party City stores and getting my gas tank filled, we were finally within spitting distance of my mother-in-law's when I realized I had forgotten the cake itself. So we dropped off all our stuff, turned around and went back home for the cake – an hour-long round trip.

Luckily, I was smart enough to pick up an extra cake mix, eggs, and the pan "just in case" my cake turned out to be too small. Which, of course, it did.

Anyway, let me backtrack. When I first saw the cake I wanted to make, there were a few assembly notes provided by the artist, though not nearly as many as someone of my experience requires. She mentioned using a 9 x 13 x 4 pan, which I had to order from Fat Daddio's (a cool online professional baking pan and tools store). Even though she also mentioned cutting the cake and using dowels, I didn't really put two and two together because I'd never made a stacked cake before.

I just kind of thought that, after the cake was baked and cooled, I'd stand it up on its end. But once I saw the cooked cake, it didn't look thick enough to hold up – it certainly wasn't 4", which surprised me since Beth, the artist, led me to believe a 2-layer cake was all she made. Of course, I'm sure she wasn't relying on Duncan Hines, either, so I guess I'll cut her some slack.

Anyway, when I saw it wasn't going to go as planned, I called over to Cincinnati Cake and Candy Supply and the helpful young lady who answered the phone got me to understand that you cut the width of the cake into thirds, then stack those on top of each other and insert the rods to build the cake. O-------h! I get it...Sort of.

For whatever reason (maybe because I was in the school of Journalism and not Engineering), it seemed like a good idea to put the dowels in kind of a diamond formation in the middle of the cake. After I was pretty far along into decorating, the cake started to lean forward, so I put a few more dowels into the corners. The next morning, the cake had started to lean backwards, so I wound up having to put a few shims under the cake plate. Thankfully, SpongeBob had the good taste to stay erect long enough for us to cut into him.

A post-consultation with my friends at Cincinnati Cake and Candy enlightened me to the wisdom behind putting the rods into the corners in the first place, with a couple more in the middle for extra support. The pro I spoke with explained that too many dowels can cause just as many structural problems as not enough; so I learned the importance of placement. Hopefully, I'll do better next time.

Overall, I was out of my league with this cake. While I got a lot of compliments, I was disappointed. It didn't look like the picture. But Ian's reaction made it all worth while – he loved it and it showed. So I'm trying not to be too hard on myself and give me credit for pushing my limits, getting creative and finishing what I set out to do. Someone please remind me not to get so crazy next year.

Easy Pasta Dinner

2009-06-24T22:04:00.003-04:00

Tonight, I whipped together a surprisingly tasty pasta dish and thought I'd share my culinary brilliance with you in case you wanted to emulate. I was in the mood for a tomato-based cream sauce and used some of what I remembered from the last alfredo-ish dish I made to create a veritable masterpiece. Sorry no pictures, but it's probably just as well since it's kinda weird to look at.

While bringing my water to a boil, I sauteed some onions, carrots, broccoli florets and sliced almonds in about half a stick of butter. Once my pasta was bubbling away (I used whole wheat rotini), I added about half a block of cream cheese. After it started to melt, I added a half cup of milk.

Spice-wise, I used cracked pepper, salt and red pepper flakes. Then I added a can of organic diced tomatoes, liquid and all, as well as some diced leftover rotisserie chicken. At this point, it looked pretty disgusting and I thought for sure I'd screwed the pooch on dinner, but since I was committed, I plunged ahead and sprinkled in some parm, then dumped the whole sticky, ugly looking mess into my pot of now-drained pasta and combined.

Upon spooning some of the questionable grub into bowls and sprinkling some more cheese on top, we dug in, only to find it was, in fact, delicious. We both had two bowls. I'd definitely make it again, maybe even adding a little vodka, as I imagine a vodka sauce is kind of creamy, tomato-y, though I'm probably remembering it wrong.

The only thing I'd do differently next time is omit the almonds, maybe substituting pine nuts, maybe leaving nuts out all together. We'll see what kind of mood I'm in.

Beer Can Chicken

2009-05-25T22:08:00.007-04:00

Back when my family used to actually exchange Christmas gifts, my brother and his wife gave my husband, Rick, How to Grill by Steven Raichlen. We haven't used it that often simply because we're lazy, infrequent grillers, but whenever we do it, it has been fantastic.

Since our friends, Andy and Jean, were coming over for dinner last night and we were already out of grocery budget for the month, I decided to fire up the grill and make Beer Can Chicken*. We had two whole fryers courtesy of our local warehouse foods store and a few cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon (I kid you not) already on hand.

I took the fryers out of the freezer Thursday evening so they'd have time to thoroughly thaw out in the fridge (though I took them out early afternoon and sat them on the counter, just to be sure). Before cooking, I pulled all the extra yucky stuff out of the body cavities, rinsed the chickens inside and out with cold water, then patted them dry with paper towels.

(Now would be a good time to heat up your grill for indirect grilling. We have a three burner gas grill, so Rick put some wood chips in the box and turned the two outside burners on high; you should lower to medium once the chips start smoking. We didn't, so Rick left the lid up until the heat dropped to avoid complete and total annihilation of the chickens. As a side note, not sure how much the chips added, but they didn't hurt.)

The largest hands-on time commitment was making a batch of Steven's Basic Barbecue Rub, which didn't take long. Once finished, I sprinkled about 3 teaspoons inside and outside each bird (you could also put some under the skin if you're so inclined) and put a about 1/2 a teaspoon in each opened can of beer. (You'll have plenty left over for future grill outs.)

Please note: before you get your hands all covered with bacteria-ridden raw chicken, you may want to open your beer cans (I wasn't this smart), pour about half of each can into a glass for consumption immediately following bird preparation, and make three extra holes in the tops of each can with an old-fashioned church key-style can opener. (A little research brought another option to my attention: just take off the entire top of the beer can with a regular can opener.)

Once the chickens were seasoned and the beer cans opened and half-drained, I stuck the cans up those chickens' butts to deliver one final indignity upon the poor creatures whose only crimes were giving their lives for our dining pleasure. Then I propped them up on a platter and they sat up there rather nicely, like a tripod, with the legs helping to hold them up. Finally, I tucked the wings behind their backs in a very seductive 'come hither' pose (per Steven's instructions).

From there, I just brought the tray outside, transferred the birds to the grill (onto the middle grate under which the burner was NOT turned on), closed the lid and let it do the work for the next hour and a half.

We brought them in, had a heckuva time trying to get those beer cans out of the girls' butts without spilling hot beer all over the place (Jean had a good idea I will try next time – a little Pam on the can before insertion), then cut up one of the juiciest, most delicous chickens I've ever had. Served with rice, homemade gravy and carrots. Yum!

One bird was polished off, the other untouched, so I put it in a zippered bag and into the fridge until tonight's dinner, at which time I heated the oven to 450˚, put the whole chicken in a pan and reheated it for about 20 minutes. Then I turned on the broiler for two minutes. The breast meat really wasn't hot enough, but that's mainly because I had the bird upside down – obviously, I don't know my fowl anatomy. Made more rice and gravy (I'd saved the 'extra' drippings and this time added a sprinkling of the rub the gravy – delicious) and had another stellar dinner.

So give this fast, fun and easy recipe a try. Neither you nor your guests will be disappointed.

* this version is very slightly different than the one in How to Grill

Squirrel Problem? No Problem.

2009-05-10T23:13:00.002-04:00

At least not according to the fine folks at the National Home Gardening Club. If you're tired of flying rats with tails (believe me, I find them irresistibly cute myself) stealing seed virtually straight from the mouths of birds in your backyard, you may want to give Cole's Hot Meats Birdseed a try. Maybe even literally – it actually sounds pretty tasty.

Back to my Roots

2009-05-04T22:39:00.002-04:00

I don't have what you'd call a green thumb. I joke that it's black, but that's an exaggeration. While I'm not a natural, I can keep plants alive. There's one ivy I've had since my sister bequeathed it to me when she went off to college back in the early '80s, same dirt and everything.

When we moved into our house almost 5 years ago, there was a fairly large, very overgrown garden in the back. I was excited at the prospect of getting it going again, especially after a neighbor told me how fertile the soil was thanks to the loving, tender care of the pre-previous owners. He insisted I could grow anything as he'd helped his friend haul in all the manure and other goodies so many years ago.

Based on my brother James' recommendation, I picked up Mel Bartholomew's Square Foot Gardening and gave it a whirl. It wasn't what you'd call wildly successful. Zucchini wouldn't grow even though Mr. Barholomew advises against even trying since it will take over your garden. You can imagine what a blow to the old self-esteem that partiucular failure was.

Cucumbers sprouted up strong, tall and healthy only to succumb to wilt overnight. That was a wee bit disappointing. And my beloved cilantro died not long after it was planted. Some things, like my cantaloupe and honeydew, never even bothered to shoot.

On the upside, we enjoyed a decent crop of tomatoes. The banana peppers I accidentally bought (thought they were jalapenos) grew like weeds and mint, thyme and dill all were quite respectable.

The following year, I was extremely pregnant come garden prep time, so I skipped it. Then last year, I had a one-year-old and we were in the middle of remodeling our kitchen, so the weeds took over.

This year, I've been fantasizing about renting a tiller to get the party started. After several weeks of talking about it, I finally decided to just go at it the old fashioned way. So this afternoon at about 3:30, I walked into the wildnerness and started swinging my trusty hoe. Two hours later, you can actually see dirt. Yippee! Five hours later, I'm having trouble walking, but that's another post.

My grand plan is to get back in the garden tomorrow to extract the rest of the weeds, finish turning the soil and then have my seeds in the ground by Mother's Day. Wish me luck.

Holy Clam Juice, Batman – That was Delicious!

2009-04-09T19:14:00.003-04:00

So I've been avoiding a can of clams I've had in the basement for a while now. Only the good Lord knows why I picked it up in the first place, though I do vaguely remember enjoying some sort of spaghetti with clams my mom made growing up.

Tonight, I was trying to figure out what to make for dinner around 6 p.m. when I saw it and thought, What the heck? The only problem was, I had no idea what to do with it and my parents weren't on Skype. Without real long distance, I figured I'd go to my old standby, allrecipes.com, and found this recipe.

It was surprisingly fantastic. I say this because the inside of a can of clams isn't that appealing. The sound of it really isn't, either. Don't even get me started on smell. When I told my husband, Rick, what I was making he replied, "I don't think I like that." Well, turns out he was mistaken. He gobbled it right up, along with my 21-month-old. I couldn't believe it.

If you find yourself with a wayward can of clams and some pasta, give it a try. These are the adjustments I made: because i only used 1/2 a pound of spaghetti, i cut the oil down to 1/8 cup and used 2 TBSP butter, 4 cloves of garlic, 1 15 oz can of chopped clams and about half the juice, along with half of the spices.

Some other reviewers suggested adding white wine, which I may try next time. For sure, I'll fire up a piece of bread to sop up all the juicy goodness. Mmmmm.

Upside Down Chicken Rice

2009-04-04T22:26:00.004-04:00

Our friends, the Cross Family, were coming over for dinner last Thursday and I had every intention of whipping up a batch of the simpliest, easiest, tastiest chicken dish ever, Sweet & Sour Chicken. My mom got this recipe years ago from Lipton Onion Soup mix; here's a version of it; she used to always use a whole chicken cut up and more preserves, but you can just wing it or let me know, and I'll look up the exact measurements.

Anyway, I was convinced I had all the ingredients on hand and even though I had made a note to double check, I decided against it and just went to the store for other items we needed. After picking up my son from his little pre-school and tucking him in for a nap, I go to assemble my ingredients and of course, they weren't all there.

In a rush to find some other kind of chicken I could make with ingredients I had on hand, I found this one for Upside Down Chicken Rice. It has a Mediterranean flare to it and even though I'm not a huge cinnamon fan and was a little hesitant about boiling chicken, it turned out really well. Give it a try.

The only things I did differently: used boneless skinless chicken breasts, added in about a cup of frozen peas as another reviewer suggested, and cut waaaaay back on the oil. Although I was tempted to toast the nuts in the oil, I just toasted them in a dry pan. And when I fried the chicken and carrots before adding the rice, etc., I only put in a tablespoon or two versus 1/4 cup.

I also tried to cut down on the number of dirty pans, though technically I dirtied more plates and bowls in the process. For instance, I didn't want to fry the chicken and carrots in a new pot, so I just removed the main solid contents to a plate and poured the stock into a bowl, then poured 3 cups of this into a 4-cup Pyrex liquid measuring cup. (BTW, the recipe is set up to make 12 servings so make sure to pare it down; I went to four.)

Otherwise, the only other thing I'd do differently in the future is skip the frying in the oil part. I don't think it's worth the effort, but you can make your own mind up. Enjoy!

Cake on the Mind

2009-03-31T21:01:00.004-04:00

So, for whatever reason, procrastinator that I usually am, tonight I'm looking around for SpongeBob SquarePants cake and party ideas for Ian's second birthday in June. I found some really neat ones and thought I'd share in case you, too, are in the market.

NickJr.com has a cute 2D cake and they give you step-by-step instructions on how to recreate it, which I thought was a nice touch. The entire site is actually kind of cool, with everything from party suggestions and recipes to parenting and travel tips.

Since I always enjoy a challenge, I'm thinking I'll want to go 3D when the time comes and found this great cake on Flickr by avid cake decorator Beth (check out all her cakes at her cakespace link, but be prepared: there's a female torso that took me by surprise).

If Ian were older, I'd seriously consider trying to emulate this 3D Pineapple House cake from easy-birthday-cakes.com, but he's too young to make the connection so I'll have go full-on Bob.

Doing all this cake searching got me nostalgic for cakewrecks.com. Sadly, there's not much I remember to do daily (brush my teeth, eat, go to the bathroom), so it's been a while since I've been there. Nothing has changed - still awesome. Makes me want to actively seek out horrible cakes I can share with her.

Anyway, while checking it out, I saw her Sunday Sweets: The Undead Wed post. Not sure why that would be the theme on National Lemon Chiffon Cake Day, but hey, who am I to question. Let me tell you, there are some cool cakes here. If I'd have had a Halloween wedding, I would have wanted the Corpse Bride cake. Fantastic. Check them out, then try to recreate one come October. I'm going to – if I remember.

Can this Clutterbug be Cured?

2009-03-02T22:17:00.004-05:00

That's the million-dollar question right now. As I've mentioned in the past, I have way more than my fair share of clutter.

If it's not an over-stuffed drawer full of underwear my butt has long outgrown, it's a forest's worth of paper strewn all about our bedrooms, living room and kitchen table. If it's not a closet full of packing peanuts and gift bags, it's a pantry full of soon-to-expire food. If it's not a 10-foot stack of magazines, it's a cabinet overflowing with cookbooks. If it's not a linen closet with little hotel shampoos falling off the shelf every time you open the door, it's a dresser top covered with more crap than a Christmas turkey.

Across the board, I have stuff coming out the wazoo and quite frankly, I'm tired of living like this. It stresses me out. It makes me feel like I'm not getting anything accomplished even if I'm busy cleaning, doing laundry, and going through stuff all day long. It depresses me. It makes me feel bad about myself. It's ruining my quality of life.

What am I doing about it? So far, I've signed up for Peter Walsh's Clutter Crew via Oprah.com. I even printed out the Clutter Pledge (or whatever it's called) but wound up recycling it versus signing it - it just felt too silly. Though maybe if I had thoroughly committed, I'd be keeping up with my homework assignments. Perhaps I'm just bitter they didn't contact me to be a part of their Clean Up Your Messy House tour - I did actually send in my story, though I left a few key issues out. Guess it's true what they say about that letter: sleep on it before you send it.

My friend, Christine, wants to start a decluttering business and was looking for people willing to let her take before and after pictures. If nothing else, the state of my house makes for some very compelling photography. She has come over twice to help me declutter our bedroom and we have made great progress. All of the stuff I had in there has been separated and boxed according to room and person – Rick and Ian each have their own boxes, there's a box for Goodwill and a box to go downstairs – or tossed in the trash.

She also did a great job of clearing off our dressers and rearranging some things to make it look more streamlined. And she gave me a lot of things to think about in the way I view my clutter. As soon as I get those boxes out of there, I'll share the pix, though I admit I'm afraid that'll never happen and I'll wind up recluttering the place. Please pray for strength for me – I need it.

Another thing I'm doing is reading a great book called Let Go of Clutter by Harriet Schechter. She really makes you think about the hows the whys and the whats of all this crap people tend to keep and talks about eliminating clutter versus simply organizing it. And believe it or not, that's what I'm after. GET IT OUTTA MY HOUSE, OUTTA MY LIFE AND OFFA MY BACK.

I'll keep you posted.

Feeling lucky?

2009-03-02T21:03:00.002-05:00

I am, for a strange reason. Tonight, I wanted to make a pasta and the veggies I had on hand were carrots, squash, asparagus and broccoli. I did an ingredients search on allrecipes.com that netted absolutely zero. So I just typed in pasta - there's only 2,713 to choose from. After scanning one lone recipe that wouldn't work, I decided to re-search, this time for creamy pasta. Just 81 of those.

The first one, Creamy Pasta Primavera, had four stars, so I figured I'd give it a look. Even thought I didn't have most of the necessary ingredients, I thought I'd read a review or two. The first one, by Caliloo, said:

"As it is written, this is a bland mess. However, the thought behind it is good so I took it a few steps further. I added 2 cloves of minced garlic, 6 stalks of asparagus cut in 1 inch lengths, a small yellow squash sliced, some par boiled baby carrots and a cup of broccoli florets. Saute all the garlic and veggies together until they are heated through then continue as the recipe is written."

What are the chances? It seemed like kismet, so I whipped it up by sauteing a little shallot, garlic and onion along with par-microwaved carrots, asparagus, broccoli and squash. I only had about half a block of cream cheese, so I cut down on the milk and I used some leftover rotisserie chicken. A little salt, pepper, red pepper flakes, dried basil (might leave that one out next time), extra parm and voilá. We had ourselves a meal.

Next time, I might add a little white wine and if I happen to have shrimp on hand, I'll throw it in. Now if only my lottery numbers could be so lucky.

Grab a Cuppa Joe, Hold the Filter

2009-02-15T22:02:00.006-05:00

You made need them for something else. Check out these other handy uses sent to me by a friend. I've actually used them to strain used oil before and you'd better believe I'm going to try one next time I wax my lip.

1. Cover bowls or dishes when cooking in the microwave. Coffee filters make excellent covers.

2. Clean windows and mirrors. Coffee filters are lint-free so they'll leave windows sparkling.

3. Protect China. Separate your good dishes by putting a coffee filter between each dish.

4. Filter broken cork from wine. If you break the cork when opening a wine bottle, filter the wine through a coffee filter.

5. Protect a cast-iron skillet. Place a coffee filter in the skillet to absorb moisture and prevent rust.

6. Apply shoe polish. Ball up a lint-free coffee filter.

7. Recycle frying oil. After frying, strain oil through a sieve lined with a coffee filter.

8. Weigh chopped foods. Place chopped ingredients in a coffee filter on a kitchen scale.

9. Hold tacos. Coffee filters make convenient wrappers for messy foods.

10. Stop the soil from leaking out of a plant pot. Line a plant pot with a coffee filter to prevent the soil from going through the drainage holes.

11. Prevent a Popsicle from dripping. Poke one or two holes as needed in a coffee filter.

12. Why use expensive strips to wax your eyebrows when you can use strips of coffee filters instead.

13. Put a few in a plate and put your fried bacon, French fries, chicken fingers, etc. on them. Soaks out all the grease.

14. Keep in the bathroom. They make great "razor nick fixers."

Some People Just Shouldn't Have Parties

2009-02-04T14:40:00.006-05:00

I'm one of those people. Parties just stress me out from start to finish. From when to have it, who to invite (even though most people don't care one way or the other - which also stresses me out), and what to serve to why people aren't RSVPing, who's going to show up and what time is everyone going to leave (it used to bother me if the parties ended too early; not so much now that I'm a sleep-deprived mom).

Before the day of the party, I'm stressing out trying to figure out the menu, the bar and the set up. I'm also running around trying to decorate, particularly in the case of our most recent shindig, the Ornament Exchange Party. And wondering why people aren't RSVPing.

The day of the blessed event, I'm stressing out trying to clean up and prepare food up to the minute people arrive. At least 3 trips to the store are made between me and my husband, Rick, picking up last minute items, those things I forgot on a previous trip or to buy paper plates (since the plates I thought I had turned out to be napkins). And I stress out wondering if anyone's going to show up, but hoping that no one shows up too early because we're not ready.

During the event itself, I stress over the food (do we have enough? is it staying hot? do people like it? why aren't they eating [insert item here]? ), the beverages (do we have enough? are we running out of ice? what happened to all the cups?), and the guests (are they having fun? are they interacting? do they need anything?). It's enough to drive a gal crazy.

So bottom line: parties stress me out. But I love being a hostess, so I guess I'll just have to deal. Hope to see you at my next get-together. Just ignore me if I'm curled up in a corner somewhere, trembling.

Redneck Seafood Dinner

2009-02-04T14:37:00.002-05:00

My friend Suzi just sent me this picture in an email. I've seen it before and love it, but keep forgetting to make it for my beano. At 19 months, he probably won't think it's too cool, but maybe you and yours will. Since we're currently out of hot dogs, thought I'd post a real picture and inspire you, dear readers, to take the challenge and whip up something special tonight. Let me know how it goes.

Chili Takes the Chill Out

2009-01-27T00:33:00.003-05:00

My husband, Rick, has a few signature dishes he periodically makes. Most of them have been in his repertoire for awhile – Salmon Patties and Shepherd's Pie are holdovers from his youth and he's made his version of Stir Fry since before we met.

But there's one recipe he started making just since we've been married and it's really good – Award-Winning Chili from allrecipes.com. Since it was cold, we're expecting the white death and we had three pounds of ground turkey in the freezer, I decided to give it a go. And it turned out pretty well.

There were only two ingredients I didn't have on hand. Cilantro – which I absolutely love but didn't miss – and chili seasoning packets, so I used Chili Seasoning Mix II, also from allrecipes.com.

If you like a hearty chili, give this one a try. It has a few unique ingredients - like carrots - and tastes great with corn chips and cheese - mmmmm.

Creme Brulee French Toast

2009-01-21T21:39:00.003-05:00

I put this together Saturday afternoon for our post-party breakfast. Our friends, Jean and Andy, were spending the night, so I wanted to be prepared. It's one of those overnight french toasts and I thought that would sure beat making breakfast from scratch.

Since I was making it pre-party, I was in a rush and didn't get to read others' reviews so I made it exactly as the recipe dictated. Then I stuck it in the fridge and all I had to do in the morning was pop it in a preheated oven. Because I'm such an over-achiever, I defrosted some goetta I'd already sliced and fried that up. Delish.

Next time I make it, I'll add pecans and sprinkle a little cinnamon on top as other allrecipes.com reviewers suggested. And should you decide to try it yourself, be advised: it takes about 10-15 minutes longer than LynnInHK would lead you to believe.

note: Sorry I didn't think to take any pictures before it was too late, but there are a few with the recipe.

Another Resolution to Add to the Pile

2009-01-21T21:21:00.003-05:00

So I'm in my allrecipes.com account, trying to put my hands on a Buffalo Chicken Dip recipe I wanted to make for our party this past weekend when I realized I had 497 recipes in my account, scant few of which I've actually ever tried.

Yes, it's just another manifestation of my deep-seeded clutter instinct. Regardless, I thought to myself: forget the Julia/Julia Project (congrats to Julie Powell; apparently, they've made a movie out of it). Forget A Year of CrockPotting. Forget the Cupcake Project. I'm going to undertake the Allrecipes.com Project and either start making some of these recipes or get rid of them.

My first recipe since making this decision: the Grilled Apple and Swiss Cheese Sandwich, which isn't really the best example of a recipe, but it's a start, dammit.

It was good. I wound up making it twice to use up the ingredients I purchased for it. The first time I made it with French bread, thinking it would grill up nicely. Unfortunately, French is not the best bread to use because it really dried out, plus I cut it too thick.

Today I made it with some multi-grain sandwich bread (sorry, no pix). Tasty, but I kind of burned it. Both times, I finished it off in a 350° oven because I like my cheese really melty. So even though this sandwich didn't turn out perfectly either time, through no fault of its own, I'd recommend it because it's a great flavor combination.

* note: if you do put your skillet in the oven and are smart enough to use a potholder to get it out, don't forget to apply that same brainpower to using it again should you decide to move said skillet once out of the oven. Sadly, I did not, but my reflexes were such my burn is minor.

How My Mind Works is God's Own Mystery

2009-01-14T13:37:00.002-05:00

So I'm sitting here trying to figure out what we're serving at our annual Ornament Exchange Party this Saturday. (Yes, this is a current post – my husband thought it would be less chaotic having it outside of the actual holiday season. Little did he realize our last minute habits would remain the same.)

Anyway, I'm trying to get my grocery/booze list together since today is going to be the warmest day of the rest of the week (26˚) and I don't want to wait until Saturday – that will really give me a coronary. A few weeks before Christmas, Allrecipes.com had sent a weekly newsletter focusing on holiday drinks that I wanted to check out. I remember at the time thinking – I don't need to save this email. I can just do a search on their site when the time comes.

Not so fast. While I may be remembering the recipes wrong, I couldn't find all of the Bailey's options I thought I saw. So I decided to check my email inbox (I currently have over 35 pages in there) and I had every stinking newsletter they sent in December EXCEPT the one I need. How's that for irony? As if one lousy email more would have made any difference...sigh.

We Don't Nee sd No Stinkin' Taco Seasoning Packets

2009-01-06T23:22:00.004-05:00

I've always thought about 'making' my own taco seasoning. With all the extra salt and preservatives you find in prepackaged stuff, it couldn't hurt. Tonight I had my chance.

My dreams of making French Chicken in a Pot (courtesy of a Cook's Illustrated email) were shattered when I hadn't started it by 5:15 and it takes about 2.5 hours (at least, with me behind the wheel). 8 p.m. seemed a little late to eat with an 18-month-old to feed, so I opted for Plan B: Tacos.

Over the weekend, we picked up some taco shells at the grocery and I had some ground turkey gathering icicles in the freezer. What we didn't have was any seasoning. So I went to my trusted source, allrecipes.com, and picked the one with the most stars - Taco Seasoning I.

I thought it was easy to make and tasted great. Rick thought it was really hot and only ate 3 tacos; I think poor Ian burned his little mouth. [Wound up making him a delicious, nutritious, and high in salt (not to mention lips and assholes) hot dog. Only the best for my son.]

Four hours later, I'm noticing a little tingly sensation in the back of my throat. Honestly, I didn't find it that spicy while eating it (what I'd term 'medium' as far as heat goes) but maybe if I'd only sprinkled on half a batch, it would have been more palatable for the rest of the fam. But if you're among those that like it hot, I think you'll enjoy it.

Do a Little Crock-Pot Cookin'

2009-01-04T23:21:00.003-05:00

Thanks to Working Moms Against Guilt's Friday Finds, I found out about A Year of CrockPotting. While the project itself is over, the blog is still there, with all 365 days of fabulous recipes. Plus, Stephanie, the author with a self-described "unnatural obsession" with her crockpot, will continue to update the site about once a week. It could be just what you're looking for to help make your life easier in the new year.

Resolutions

2009-01-01T15:22:00.002-05:00

Technically, I should stop making them. If I've learned anything, it's that starting or stopping something on a big day (like New Year's or your birthday or anything like that) is almost a sure-fire way to guarantee failure. It's too easy to keep track of your progress (or not) and get discouraged.

For example, I quit smoking several times in the 20 years I was a smoker, often beginning on New Year's Eve or during Lent. As a resolution, it would begin weighing on my mind, thinking: I haven't had a cigarette in x days or x weeks or x months. And the pressure would get to be too much. I'd have to just have one. Then another. Then, next thing you know, I'd have a pack eyeballing me from the seat of my car.

I'm almost 5 years free and clear of cigarettes and I believe it's because I can't remember an exact day that I quit. I know it was near Lent, but not Ash Wednesday, so I wasn't temped come Easter Sunday to light up. Plus, I quit during a very stressful time in my life - planning my wedding - and I knew that if I could make it through something like that, I'd never again need that crutch. (Which is a good thing as I'm the type that likes to create stress.)

Anyway, all that said, I'm going to make some resolutions and hope that I'll stick to them even though I'll easily be able to measure my success or failure. Here they are, in no particular order:
• get my blog going again (so far, so good)
• take care of my body
• take care of my soul through church (missed my first opportunity on New Year's Day, but back in the saddle today) and prayer
• take care of my mind (by learning new things and reading more often)
• declutter (started cleaning out the basement today and already organized our pantry)
• be a positive force in my own life
• keep in better contact with friends and relatives (calls, letters, visits)

I guess that's enough self-improvement for one year. What are you guys shooting for?

My New Best Friend

2009-01-01T15:09:00.003-05:00

For Christmas, I asked for a label maker. I can't remember where I first read about it or what initially got me to thinking I needed one, but the bottom line was I believed it could help me get organized, so I put a star by it on my Christmas list.

Thanks to my mother-in-law, Charlie, I am the proud new owner of a Brother P-Touch 1280 model (ain't it pretty?) and I've been using the heck out of it so far in the kitchen.

One afternoon, I used it to help me organize my pantry, which was ridiculously out of control. We have one (loving called the monolith) with drawers in it and it was a huge mess. Foods were all mixed together and on top of one of another. Not a great way to go about making dinner or even compiling an accurate grocery list.

So while my husband was out doing Lord only knows what and my precious beano was snoozing away, I took everything out of the pantry, ditched the old, stale, yucky stuff and grouped what was left together so it would be easier to find what I'm looking for.

The label maker came in handy by labeling the shelves so my husband and I will both know where to look for something and where to put it back. And I used it to label clear containers I've purchased to keep cereals fresh and bags of rices, etc., in an easy to see and stock format.

In the fridge, I've been labeling leftovers like a madwoman. No more wondering when I made that grilled fish or what kind of soup that is. It's all right there on the label for me.

The only complaint I have about it (and it's probably something I can change; I just haven't gotten around to reading the instruction manual yet) is that there's a lot of wasted space before and after the label info.

Other than that, I'm glad I got one and can't wait to see what it can help me organize in the rest of the house.

Christmas is Just 3 Days Away

2008-12-21T20:41:00.003-05:00

In case you didn't know. And in case you're worse off than I am (is that even possible? I haven't bought one gift for my adorable 18 month old son) and have yet to send out those Christmas cards, there's still time. Thanks to Sam's Club.

Yes, I can hardly believe I'm saying it myself, Wal*Mart hater that I am. (Can't help it - they are totally crushing mom and pop stores out of existence as well as some other big box stores, and what ever happened to Sam Walton's promise of made in America anyway? But I digress...)

Sam's Club can print you up some adorable photo-centric cards in about an hour - dirt cheap. We ordered ours last weekend. Didn't get them out until Thursday, but that's only because Sam's can't get your address list together. But you can still buy holiday stamps there...

We ordered 150 cards featuring our little man and it was just $34.50, plus tax, envelopes included. If I'd have known that, I may have gotten cards out last year. (Instead, I let my middle sister, Kathy, lay a huge guilt trip on me for not doing cards my baby's first Christmas...which she even revisited this year when she was asking if I had gotten any out yet...but that's another therapy session.)

As luck would have it, the machine jammed up in the middle of our order, so we wound up with about 200 cards, which worked in our favor since, as it turned out, we really needed about 180 cards (ridiculous, I know, and we even cut a few out). Sweet!

So if you're further behind the 8-ball then us, go to Sam's tomorrow*. Setting up the cards is easy on their computers - just bring the photo(s) you want on a jump drive and follow the easy instructions on the computers they have there. Send your cards to print, do some shopping, and swing back by to pick them up. If you get the cards in the mail by lunch, they just might make it in time.

* you can order the cards online if you want, but we found there were more options in-store.

Those Darned Folks at M&M Mars

2008-08-09T10:52:00.004-04:00

They have the cutest ideas. I just got a newsletter emailed to me with the subject line "Beach Party" and one of the features is these "Catch of the Day" cookies. Adorable! Check out their website to see all their fun beachy (albeit sugary sweet) recipes.

A Shade Dirtier

2008-08-08T16:59:00.002-04:00

Our living room, dining room and upstairs landing windows all have Hunter Douglas Duette honeycomb shades on them. Apparently, these are high-end window coverings. They were here when we got here. Unfortunately, they are beyond dirty and they've been that way since we moved in thanks to the previous owners. (They did not aspire to Godliness - it took me 2.5 hours to clean all their gunk out of the fridge after we bought the place.)

Gross, I know; it'd be bad enough if it was just our own dirt and dust on there. But I digress.

Since finally hanging some drapes in our living room (we've lived here four years come August 17), I became motivated to clean the shades and found some instructions on the Hunter Douglas website. While my guinea pig shade is cleaner, I wouldn't say I got the results I was hoping for.

Hunter Douglas recommends having an On-Site™ certified technician come in and clean them. I called the local outfit and based on a ballpark estimate, this will cost us between $400-$500. Talk about getting taken to the cleaners.

But they are extremely gross and they are quality shades, so I'm entertaining the idea. Rick, however, is not. He wanted me to find a lower priced alternative or suggested completely replacing the shades, which is not an option, imho.

A-one Cleaners sounds like they can clean them, though I wasn't completely instilled with confidence that they knew what I was talking about. However, if they did, for all 10 of the Duette shades we have, it'll cost us about $60, a substantial savings.

My question is: does anyone have these shades and/or had them cleaned before? Any
suggestions would be appreciated. Because, damn.

Here's a Flour Tip for You

2008-06-21T22:16:00.003-04:00

This just in from my Notes from the (America's) Test Kitchen from my pals over at Cook's Illustrated: to keep your flour fresh and bug-free, store it in the freezer. But if you don't have that kind of frozen real estate, get the same results by keeping it in your microwave instead. Just take it out when you need to nuke something.

I Wouldn't Call This "Living"

2008-06-21T00:02:00.003-04:00

Take a peek at our living room. Yes, this is how we've been living for the past 8 weeks. Cozy, isn't it? I don't think I'll know what to do with myself once we have room to walk around in here again. Assuming that once all the dust settles from our kitchen remodel I'll be in the mood to clean it up.

There's a Light at the End of the Tunnel

2008-06-20T23:47:00.003-04:00

And it's coming from under our kitchen cabinets. And above the sink. And the ceiling fan. And the refrigerator.

Yes, folks, it's true. Just one day short of 8 weeks later, we actually have electricity in our kitchen again. Ya-hoo! I am so excited. The only disappointment was flipping the ceiling fan switch near our back door and nothing happening, but I guess it wouldn't be our kitchen project if everything went smoothly.

Another little 'funny' was wondering why we had an outlet on the left side of the stove near the small window, seemingly for no reason. Then remembering that, way back at the beginning, there was supposed to be a cabinet over there. Ha ha, right? But you can't have too many outlets in the kitchen, that's what I always say. Plus, it will come in handy next time I want to use my stick blender directly in a pot on the stove. It's the little things...

Now, I don't want to set myself up for disappointment, so I'm not really banking on it, but rumor has it we'll be finished with the kitchen this weekend. Somehow, I don't think all the little details will be wrapped up by then, but we'll be damn close. And all my appliances should be hooked up, in position and ready for action. Watch out Kroger, here I come!

Cupcake Cutthroats

2008-06-20T23:06:00.005-04:00

Wish I could come up with something like this. *sigh*

Thank God That's Behind Me

2008-06-18T23:45:00.004-04:00

Don't get too excited; I'm not referring to the kitchen project. That still lives on. But last Friday, I finally got my last two Christmas gifts in the mail. For 2007. Color me excited – it was a long time coming. And it was a giant, ominous, depressing, dark cloud hanging over my head. So now that it's finally gone, there's room for the other 17 or so waiting patiently behind it to move in. Yippee.

It's Been an Exasperating Day

2008-06-15T00:17:00.004-04:00

Let me preface this entry by saying that I realize, in the grand scheme of things, the problems, frustrations and disappointments I've encountered with this kitchen remodel are nothing compared to what's going on in Iraq, Darfur, the National Democratic Party headquarters and any number of other places in the world.

With that said, please allow me to dump the details of this day from hell. It started in much the same way as many other days associated with this project have: filled with anticipation and guarded hope – in many ways, it seemed entirely possible that we would pick up our backsplash tile, start laying it and be done by early afternoon.

Unfortunately, nothing even remotely close to this scenario was in the cards. After a delicious, relaxing breakfast at Pleasant Ridge Chili, one of our regular haunts since this journey began 7 weeks ago, (Yes, folks, it has been that long, God help us.) we headed over to The Tile Shop to pick up our backsplash tile. On the drive over, I said (and perhaps I jinxed us here): Dare a girl dream? The resounding answer: Hells no.

We've been to this little warehouse/showroom several times and every time we've been there, I've asked and confirmed and triple-checked that they did, indeed, have our backsplash tile in stock, ready to be picked up whenever we were. (Ironically, this tile was one of the first things we settled on way back in the day.)

So there was no doubt in my mind that we'd walk in, tell them what we needed (50 square feet, by Jim's estimation), drop several benjamins and be on our merry way. As luck would have it, they had just sold the crux of their stash but would happily order it for us – it would be here by Thursday. That's when the shine first started to come off the penny.

You see, the plan was to get the backsplash tiled today in time for our appliances to be delivered tomorrow (that's another story in and of itself), grout tomorrow, have the electricians come back on Tuesday, and wrap this bitch up by the end of the week. Thursday would not do at all, especially since I unplugged our upstairs refrigerator this past Thursday night (part of the aforeto mentioned other story).

I said as much to Steve, our helpful salesman. He asked us to give him a minute as he figured out who bought the tile and when they needed it; maybe he could perform the old switcheroo and give us theirs and have theirs come in on Thursday. After several minutes, he came back to say it had worked. I was not convinced. Even though Jim was sporting a positive outlook, I said I wouldn't believe it until we were driving off with it. Maybe that's when I jinxed us because upon further calculations, Steve figured out that even if we bought every last one of the tiles they had on hand, presold or otherwise, we'd be short about 100 tiles.

Slit my wrists now. And the sad part is, that wasn't the worst of it. In an effort not to drag this story out too much further, we went to Home Depot and found a tile we liked, until we put it up against our granite. Yuck. So then we went to Lowe's where we picked up at least 10 different options so we could go back home and see what we liked best, if anything (we had resigned ourselves to the fact that we may have to wait 'til Thursday after all).

Surprisingly, we liked two options. So after we ate lunch, we hopped in the car and headed for the Lowe's near my house. They didn't have it, but called around to find out where we could get it. They put 40 square feet on hold for us 25 minutes east of my house and the remaining 10 square feet back up north at the Fields Ertel location, where we started.

After much searching around, the western location finally located the boxes of tile, but couldn't find more than just 5 pieces of the pencil edge we needed. We said no problem, we were going to another store and could just pick up the rest there. Not so much, as it turned out. But the guy there looked it up for us and found some out at a store about 30 miles west.

Since we hadn't had much luck thus far, I decided to give that store a call from the gas station before we took that drive just to be on the safe side, and sure enough, they didn't have them. But the nice girl there called around and called me back to say they were at the Highland Heights, Kentucky store (about 30 minutes from where we were and in another state) and that someone there would have them on hold for us.

We drove all the way out there and of course they weren't on hold, but they were at least on the shelf. By the time I walked out with them in hand, it was about 7:30 p.m. By the time we got home after grabbing a bite to eat, it was almost 9 p.m. We started out around 9:30 in the morning and 2 Home Depots, 4 Lowe's (including the same once twice) and almost 12 hours later, we still didn't have the first tile laid. De-pressing. But as Scarlett once said, tomorrow is another day. I just hope it doesn't suck as bad as today did.

It Pays to Read the Label

2008-06-13T23:55:00.005-04:00

My trusty broom was decapitated early on in the kitchen remodel. Not sure what exactly happened to it, but one day, I noticed its head just lying out on the back deck in the rain. Sad.

Not long after that, I was disturbed to see both my husband, Rick, and our friend and contractor, Jim, using another one of our brooms to sweep dry wall dust off the wall – it's the same broom we use in the basement to sweep up the wayward kitty litter. Gross!

Plus, it gave me a flashback to when I watched a former roommate clean the walls of her bathroom with her toilet brush when we were getting ready to move out. Yikes!

But I digress.

I don't get out much anymore, but my sweet little man, Ian, and I made it to Sam's Club the other day and miracle of miracles, I remembered to look for a broom.

They had a Libman version there. It looked sturdy and it was a good price, so I picked one up. As I was removed the plastic head cover, I decided to read it. Call me crazy, but I'm funny like that. Maybe it's because I'm an advertising copywriter, maybe I just need a hobby.

Regardless, I noticed on the back of this piece of plastic they had listed 'Expert Tip #22". It read:

"Get rid of spider webs and dirt! Put an old towel over the bristle head of your Libman brrom. Drag the broom head across your ceiling and into corners. Throw the towel in our next load of laundry."

While I'm not necessarily down with putting sticky, yucky spider web bits in with my body-cleaning towels, I thought it was a good tip. So when I saw the call to visit their web site for more cleaning tips, I figured I'd check it out.

It's a good little resource of their customers' cleaning tips, and they're not all related to Libman brooms. The set up could be a little better, but still interesting. So check it out when you get a chance. You may pick up a thing or two.

It's Just Not Funny Any More

2008-06-13T23:29:00.004-04:00

There are two running jokes here on the kitchen job site:

1) That we're in a race to see which kitchen is finished first; ours, or the one at the new location of a great Ethiopian restaurant in our neighbor that was originally slated to open October of '07.

Some days, my money is on the Ethiopian joint, though it does appear that I'll be able to fire up the oven (if it ever gets here) at our house by next weekend. [Fingers and toes crossed, please do the same.] I don't think the chefs at Emanu can say the same.

2) That our house hates us. No lie, pretty much everything we do has some kind of problem and generally speaking, if we do it once, we do it three times. It is the charm, you know. Some of the stuff that goes wrong can be attributed to 'user' error; my friends from Sweden have caused their share of headaches; and now HH Gregg is proving to be somewhat of a thorn in my side.

But something happened today that kind of gave me the creeps. I was in the basement anyway, so I decided to just go ahead and use my favorite bathroom while I was down there. After I finished my business, I went to wash my hands and noticed this gross, chunky, whitish-with-black-things in it gunk on the vanity and on the floor by the vanity.

After looking upwards, there didn't appear to be anything dripping from the ceiling. Peering in the sink, nothing seemed particularly awry there. It was a complete mystery for a few minutes as I tried to figure out where that disgusting sludge could have come from.

Finally, I determined the sink vomited. That's a creepy realization to come to. Very Amityville-horror like. And even more frightening was the fact that this all happened at 5 o'clock on a Friday – scary big bill if I have to call a plumber over the weekend. Isn't that always the way?

Our friend and contractor, Jim, told me to try some Drano and that we would pick up a snake tomorrow to see if we could clear the drain pipe. (It would seem that was backing up and causing the overflow to pop up in the sink - later on in the afternoon, more than once, the sink filled up enough to worry me it was going to overflow.)

Since I couldn't find any Drano here (nothing's ever around when you need it), I called up my neighbor, Amy, to see if she had any or, if not, if she could come over and hang out while I ran to the store since my little beano was sawing toothpicks.

She had some and was kind enough to give it to me – and to comment that my house does kind of look like the one in Amityville (thanks, Amy). By the time I got back to the sink, the water had drained out. I put some glugs of the Drano in there anyway and waited the appropriate 15 minutes to flush it with hot water.

It didn't back up again, but I believe it was thinking about it. I took a shower upstairs afterwards and brushed my teeth, the whole time wondering if I was flooding our basement as a result, but I was too scared to go look. Guess I'll find out tomorrow. I just hope the joke's not on me.

This Kitchen Remodel is Making Me Fat

2008-06-11T10:12:00.004-04:00

So here we are, halfway through our 7th week of our 3-week kitchen remodel and I have packed on 8 pounds already. Which is depressing enough in and of itself, but particularly upsetting because I was so proud of myself for losing all my pre-preggo weight plus 5 pounds. *Sigh*

It can be tied back to all the chips, Oreo cakesters, chocolate (I bought a ginormous bag of mini Mars candy bars at Sam's club last week), mayo-laden sandwiches, nightly cocktails and complete lack of exercise. But it's still upsetting.

Our contractor, Jim, said he's lost 11 pounds so far. I sure hope I don't find those other three...

What the Suck was I Thinking?

2008-06-05T00:09:00.003-04:00

One of the daily emails I get is from iVillage – it's their "Things We Love" segment. Generally speaking, they feature a lot of products I am interested in and wouldn't mind buying, but mostly they are very expensive.

That's why I was excited about their write up on Pickle Sickles. They were only $19.95 – including shipping – for a box of 20, and I could mix-n-match to try both their regular and spicy flavors. Seemed like a deal to me.

That is, until I got them. Not sure why, but I thought they were frozen pickles. In reality, they are like Fla-Vor-Ice, but with pickle juice. Now I like pickle juice. I like vinegar. I've even been known to drink malt vinegar straight. I'm weird like that. I figured I'd like these pops. So far, I've only tried the spicy version, but I'm here to tell you that try as I might, I couldn't finish the whole thing. It was too salty and, well, yucky. For a few minutes there, I thought I might hurl.

I wanted to like them, I really did. Rick thought I was nuts. He may have been right. But at $1 a piece, for all intents and purposes, I feel like I should suck it up. Or maybe pawn them off on someone else. Any takers?

If Ingvar Kamprad Were Still Alive...

2008-06-03T11:52:00.002-04:00

I'd give him a piece or two of my mind. Wait a minute, he IS still alive, worth over $23 billion dollars, and drives a 1993 Volvo 240 GL. Are you out there, Mr. Kamprad? Because I have a bone to pick with you.

Your kitchen cabinets and the frustrating lack of employee knowledge about them are driving me insane. For every one step forward in completing our total kitchen remodel, we take four steps back – and usually at least three of them can be tied back to your ridiculously successful brainchild, IKEA.

Most recent case in point: my husband, Rick, was attempting to assemble drawers for one of our cabinets last night. Following the simple illustrations in the virtually wordless instructions, the first drawer he put together wouldn't fit in the cabinet properly. As it turns out, the illustration suggests putting the drawer front on UPSIDE DOWN. Perhaps someone in the editing department overlooked this little snafu, or perhaps that person just has a sick sense of humor.

I would join in laughing, too, if we could get the damned thing back off and set it right (or wrong, according to the directions – depends on how you look at it). So that means yet another trip back to your new store in Westchester, Ohio. With gas prices what they are, all the money we saved buying from IKEA rather than one of the other box home improvement centers has been spent going to and from your store. Repeatedly. Seriously. We know the returns ladies on a first name basis. Amy will be the godmother of our next born child. It's that ridiculous.

The most frustrating thing that has happened so far, and believe me when I tell you there are plenty of little gems to choose from, was also regarding bad directions. We had the granite counter tops installed last Thursday. On Saturday, Rick went to install the split top drawers on one of our cabinets. The directions instructed him to screw in the center piece before the counter top is installed.

He told me IKEA's cabinet instructions said to put the counter tops on before installing the shevles, drawers and doors. I wanted to believe him, but I'll be honest – he and I both know I wasn't quite at 100%. I wanted a little proof so I would know who exactly to lose my sh*t with. Technically, it felt like a $1,500 mistake*. Granite isn't cheap and that mother is glued on there good. Turns out, Rick was right.

He located the "7 steps to installing your cabinets" guide your company is kind enough to provide. Sure enough, Step 6 instructs one to install the counter tops and Step 7 indicates its now time to install your shelves, drawers and doors. As you can imagine, we both found that extremely frustrating. Not to mention the cause of a little marital tension. You just may be getting a bill for couples therapy when this is all over.

It really surprises me your company has been around so long, done so well and secured such a loyal following. I can't imagine we're the first people to experience these problems. But whatever.

In closing, may I ask on behalf of money-conscious, do-it-yourselfers everywhere that you create some sort of system of checks and balances to ensure accurate instructions are included in your products? If it's not too much trouble, of course. We'd really appreciate it.

* Luckily, Rick came up with a solution of his own - installing brackets to secure the center piece. Way to go, sweetie. Here's hoping it holds up once all our utensils are in there. You are not off the hook by any means, though, Mr. Kamprad. Watch your mailbox.

Accentuating the Positive

2008-05-25T23:45:00.005-04:00

Okay, so I'm going to try and recapture my positive attitude and focus on the progress we're making. Rick and Jim got up all the wall cabinets today, including all the crown molding, most of the side panels and one of the under cabinet moldings.

They look pretty darned good. So tomorrow morning, we're going appliance shopping before the boys get back to cabinet building. Wish us luck on both counts.

Shattered House Remodel Dream #142

2008-05-25T22:33:00.004-04:00

I honestly thought we'd have all our cabinets up this weekend. If I'm going to really bare my soul, I will tell you that a week ago, I honestly thought our kitchen would be done already. So there's that.

Anyway, I figured we'd get the wall cabinets up yesterday, then the base cabinets today. I mentioned in a previous post part of what happened yesterday in regards to the over-the-range cabinet. In spite of that, two cabinets were hung. We felt pretty good about it.

Today, those had to come back down in order to put the crown molding on. They cabinets are too close to the ceiling to drill them on after the fact. So everything done yesterday had to be undone and redone today. So we had that going for us.

They do look good, don't get me wrong. I'm just hoping they get done soon so that we can continue to move forward as planned this week. For instance, the electrician wanted to come back after the cabinets were put in, and I left him a message saying we'd be ready on Tuesday. Keep your fingers crossed.

Then, the granite guy is supposed to come on Thursday, which we originally thought would be too late. Now I'm hoping it's not too early.

All along, I've tried to stay positive, but I have to admit, I was feeling a little down today. It just seems like the end is nowhere in sight. I know that it is, but there's just nothing about this remodel that is completely done.

In addition to the cabinets, he decorative floor tiles and grout still needs to be sealed as well as the thresholds put on; there is still painting to be done on the walls and trim; there is still trim to be made, attached and painted; there are still light fixtures to be selected, removed and/or attached; there are baseboards to be selected, prepared and attached; there are appliances to be selected, bought and delivered. The list just seems to go on and on.

But the fact is: it is what it is. So let's just enjoy the ride, shall we?

Fourth Time's the Charm

2008-05-25T21:25:00.003-04:00

Well, yesterday we probably hit an all-time low as far as progress goes in our kitchen remodel. Which is saying something considering Murphy's Law is in full effect here at Chez Meaux and that for every step forward we make, we take four steps back.

I am not making this up. Yesterday, we owned 4 different cabinets to use above our stove. Oddly enough, we only made 2 trips to IKEA, only because between cabinets 3 and 4, we never left the store.

Here's what happened: we picked up all our cabinets on Friday. Unfortunately, we still had the over-the-range cabinet listed as 24w x 30h in the plans, even though we already knew it had to be 30w because that's the smallest over-the-range microwave with vent you can get in stainless steal.

Thankfully, before it was put up on Saturday, I pointed out the fact that we had the wrong one. So up to IKEA I went to buy a 30w x 30h, which I did. While I was up there, Rick and Jim tried to call me to tell me another cabinet was missing the hardware. I didn't get the call because my phone was dead.

So a couple of hours later, when I got home after hitting the grocery store for some lunch fixings, I get home with the cabinet only to learn no other cabinets were hung, either, thanks to the missing hardware. And before the new 30w x 30h can be hung up, we realize it is too long - the microwave would be practically sitting on top of the range.

Last night, Rick and I packed up Ian and headed to IKEA to buy the 30w x 24h and get the missing hardware, which we did. And while we were waiting to pick it up, we decided to go upstairs for a little dinner. While we were eating dinner, we decided we'd go look around the kitchen department again and start jotting down accessories we might want.

As we were looking around, we decided to check out some of their kitchen displays again, which is when we realized we actually needed a 30w x 15h, otherwise, the microwave would still be too low. So we rushed downstairs, picked up our purchase and immediately took it over to the returns/exchange desk to get the right one.

We were there until 9:30 (they close at 9), but we left with the cabinet. And now that I see it up there, I wonder if it's too small...

Five Days in the Making

2008-05-24T00:37:00.005-04:00

Holy crap. I thought it would take one full day to lay the tile floor (after the hardy board was laid down, of course). Never in my wildest nightmare did I think it would take five days.

It all started last Sunday. I had a baby shower to cohost at my mother-in-law's, so I headed out about 10:30 in the morning. I kind of assumed floor laying activities would be commencing shortly thereafter. That was a mistake.

My phone rang around 2 p.m.; Rick was calling to tell me about what would be the first of many setbacks. A little background: after much resistance, we decided to go with a pinwheel design. We found some 16 square inch porcelain tile at Home Depot for a song – about $1.79 per square foot. To give you an idea of what kind of bargain this was, the first tile we picked out at The Tile Shop was over $5 a square foot.

The problem with both tiles was that we couldn't find a 6" square tile we could use for the center of our pinwheel. At The Tile Shop, I came up with what I thought was a brilliant idea - utilizing 5 x 5 cm accent tiles for the centerpiece. They come in square foot pieces with 6 of the mini tiles across and down. All we had to do was cut these squares into quarters and we'd have exactly the size we needed, using 9 5 cm squares.

Now back to our show. When we were at Home Depot picking up our 16" squares, they didn't have these decorative square feet; they only had two rows of tile for accent pieces, with three of these pieces supposedly making up a square foot (that should have been our first clue, but I digress). Of course, it would be a bigger pain in the butt to have to piece together the centers, but so be it. We bought 10 square feet at about $11 a square foot and thought we were ready to get tiling.

Not so fast. Turns out the decorative pieces at Home Depot were a lot smaller than the ones at The Tile Shop, so we actually had to use 4 x 4 squares instead of 3 x 3. The Home Depot near our house didn't have these pieces, so that first call at 2 in the afternoon was to say we couldn't use those inserts; apparently they didn't have time to go up to the Home Depot on Fields Ertel. So they had gone to the Lowe's near us and found solid squares they thought would work.

I had two choices: 1) I could trust their judgment and tell them to go for it or 2) have them take a picture and email it to me; I'd have to go next door to Rick's brother's house to open it because my mother-in-law does not have Internet access (can you believe that?). Anyway, against my better judgment, I send I would trust theirs.

A couple of hours later, I get another call saying that option didn't work because the center tiles were a lot thinner than our 16" squares, so they were going to The Tile Shop where they actually picked up the same 5 x 5 cm squares we had picked out for the original $5+ tile we'd initially selected.

Anyway, I know there were more calls, but I won't bore you with those details. Suffice it to say, when I got home at 7:30 that night, scant little progress had been made because they didn't actually start gluing any tile down until 5 p.m. In addition to all the wild goose chases, Rick and Jim had to figure out how to lay out the floor.

We were using the pinwheel design on the diagonal, so they couldn't just go with a straight lay starting in the middle. They had to create a square on the diagonal to use as the center point.

On Monday, Rick went into work so Jim and I were going to tackle the floor together until I had to leave for a recording session at 1:30. Not long into it, Jim hurt his knee, which he recently had surgery on, and couldn't continue. I took over as cutter and layer while he told me what tiles to work on and put the glue on for me. We actually had an efficient system going and we could have made some great progress except I had to leave. So we had to call it a day around 1 pm.

On Tuesday, Jim was feeling better and was able to get back on the floor. We worked until 11 p.m. that night so we could finish laying it all and grout the next day. Rick woke up early to put a second layer of sealant on our decorative tiles so the grout wouldn't permanently stain them. While doing this, he discovered that one of the centers wasn't actually glued down. So we lost all of Wednesday because we had to let that tile set.

So it wasn't until Thursday that we were actually able to grout. And that's how it took five days to finish our floor. The sad part is that it isn't 100% done, either. We had to finish sealing the center decorative pieces a third time because they dulled up after the grout application. Over four weeks into it, and not one part of this project is completely finished.

But we do have one beautiful floor.

The All-Day Affair

2008-05-23T23:50:00.003-04:00

So today was cabinet day. I awoke full of hope, with visions of much progress being made in the kitchen dancing in my head. All we had to do was pick up our cabinets at IKEA, bring them home and start putting them together. I even went so far as to think we might actually get one or two hung up today. Ha, ha. That was a good one.

We headed up to IKEA about 11 a.m. While we'd already done our layout in their 3D program, we still needed to review it with one of their kitchen experts to make sure it was going to work and that we had everything we needed. After that, all we had to do was buy the cabinets and be on our merry way. Easy enough, right?

Wrong. We waited close to 45 minutes before we could get anyone to help us because only two people were working in the kitchen design center. Then it was another 30 minutes of finalizing our plans. The guy we were working with said he'd get it all into the system while we were having lunch.

Lunch probably took about 45 minutes (meals are not quick when you've got a 10 month old trying to feed himself), then another 15 minutes for Rick to go pick up the paperwork. We were finally ready to head downstairs to pay and pick up our stuff. It probably only took about 5 minutes to check out, but then we needed to make sure we could rent one of their vans to haul all the stuff home. That was about another 15 minutes.

After that, we checked on our order and were told it would be about 40 minutes more. Not a minute sooner, so it turned out. Seven carts full of cabinets, shelves, feet, plinths, hinges, handles and everything else needed were waiting to be packed up. It took two empolyees another 20 minutes to load up the van.

It was 30 minutes home in traffic, 20 minutes to unload the car, then back out to IKEA to turn in the van after stopping for gas. By the time we got back home, it was 5:40 and Jim, our contractor/friend who is helping us, had already left for his anniversary date night. So not the first cabinet was put together. *sigh* But at least the kitchen is full of boxes.

I don't know if you're all familiar with IKEA or not, but the reason their cabinets are so inexpensive (what we bought today cost over 50% less than what Home Depot was going to charge us) is they come flat and you have to assemble them yourself at home. I always figured this would take us a lot longer than anticipated. I just didn't think we'd be behind before we even got started. God help us tomorrow.

Day 22 - Plumbing

2008-05-17T23:42:00.002-04:00

Okay, so I've skipped a few steps. Don't worry, we'll come back to them, as disorganized as that will be. But hey, that's my forte. So please enjoy this little tale.

Today was the day Jim (our friend/contractor) and Rick (my husband) were going to work on plumbing. That involved taking out an old iron drain pipe in the basement and replacing it with PVC, moving the sink drains from under the window over to the corner where our new sink will go, and moving the ice maker waterline across the kitchen its new location.

Jim arrived bright and early to get started at 8:30; he was planning to leave by 3 p.m. By the time I left at 11:30 to go start my own personal project hell, the boys had already been to Home Depot twice and these quotes had been spoken:

Jim: "Your house hates me."

Rick: "There were things in that [iron pipe] that no man should have to see. Personally, I think there are things living in there."

By the time I got home at 11 p.m., it was all done. Though I hear Jim didn't leave until almost 5 p.m. That sucks. Then again, I thought I'd be done with my stuff by dinner time. The best laid plans...

Speaking of which, tomorrow Rick and Jim will be laying the tile floor in a diagonal pinwheel design per my request. Hope it goes more smoothly than the pipes.

Three-and-a-Half Years in the Making

2008-05-02T17:04:00.003-04:00

We finally did it. After years of toying with the idea and months of attempting to plan, we have recently begun an in-depth kitchen remodel. Even more in-depth than originally anticipated, but that will come in future posts.

Since this is as "taking the house by storm" as it gets, I want to document the whole experience. That requires a walk back in time since I continue to be remiss in documenting my pursuit of domestic bliss and the accompanying trials and tribulations. It's on my list and part of my Cinco de Mayo resolutions. So keep your fingers crossed and the tequila coming.

We moved into our house back in September of 2004. It was built in 1920 - my husband, Rick, has a theory that it was a Sears house. Without further investigation, that romantic notion has yet to be proven, but it's a possibility.

Overall, the house displays the usual annoying traits old homes possess. Pretty much every floorboard creeks, the windows aren't very efficient (and neither is our caulking - we have yet to do it), we have a shortage of restrooms, the walls are plaster and slat, and it feels like there's almost no insulation at all in here as evidenced by our chilly home interior during winter despite high utility bills.

By the same token, it also possesses all the positive qualities: solid foundation, quality construction, charming window frames, artistic woodwork, spacious rooms and lots of personality. It even boasts a fair amount of closet space, which is uncharacteristic of older homes, so it was a great choice for our starter home.

As much as the neighbors liked to tell us what a handyman the previous owner was, as time passes, we become increasingly unimpressed with his work. Our term of endearment for him is The Half-Asses Handyman. Most projects he undertook here were not done well. Let's just say we've run into many frustrations with quality issues and he set the bar fairly low for us to follow in his footsteps.

We know we can do better than him, right?

Anyway, this project began on April 26.Here's what our kitchen looked like before we started the demo. Run down cabinets, useless soffets that waste space and block sunlight, a dishwasher that still works in spite of the odds, lusterless linoleum and ugly wall paneling. But it's all gone now. Can't say I'm sorry to see it go.

Simply Awful

2008-03-07T16:56:00.001-05:00

Ever buy something just because you have a coupon? I recently made that mistake in the international food aisle at my local Kroger. For some reason, 50¢ off any Simply Asia meal kit seemed like a good idea, even though the bag was steep at around $4.79. Just add meat, the bag said. 15 minutes, it added. So I decided to give it a try.

Let me just say this was the biggest grocery-related rip off I've ever fallen prey to. Yeah, it probably only took 15 minutes to put together – maybe even less. But really, the bulk of dish was made up of the chicken I added – which cost me in addition to what I paid for this bag of crap.

And I had to quickly boil up a bag of ramen noodles to supplement the small quantity of noodles provided – supposedly enough to feed 3-4 people. Maybe down in Whoville, but not here on earth.

While preparing the dish, the directions suggested I also add in my own green vegetables. That would have been nice to know up front. But one has to wonder: what exactly is the point of getting this kit if you have to add so many extras? Which is my point exactly: don't do it.

Disturbingly Delicious

2008-03-03T20:59:00.004-05:00

My husband recently had a birthday (he forbids me to note which one, the geezer) and I decided I wanted to make him a lobster dinner. I had the lobsters flown in from Maine – sounds ritzy, doesn't it? You can do it, too. I used the Lobster Guy and there are others out there, like Lobstergram.

The night before his birthday, I did some research on the best way to cook lobsters. I've only made them once before, and I steamed those unlucky beetles of the sea in about an inch of water. That time, I forced myself to watch them being cooked alive in the pot. It seemed the only noble way to handle the situation. And I wanted to find out for myself if they really scream – they don't.

Anyway, since then, I'd heard the 'humane' way to kill a lobster is to split its head open. Sounds dreamy, doesn't it? After much thought and some graphic photos, I decided I didn't have the cojones. Plus, I justified not doing it by the fact that I read they taste better when they're cooked alive.

In the end, I steamed them in an inch of water again. I felt terrible taking those little guys out of the container they were shipped in and putting them in the hot pot. In fact, I almost cried. I'm kind of in a precarious emotional place right now. But, once they were done, I had no problem dipping their succulent little tail meat in hot melted butter, accompanied by steamed asparagus with lemon and Parmesan, tomato pie (more on this fabulous concoction later), baked potatoes and fresh bread.

Delicious – I'd make them again, hard as it is to kill a live creature. But next time, I think I'd save a few bucks and get them at Kroger like I did the first time – blasphemous, I know, but they seemed to taste just as good.

Holy Shitake Mushrooms

2008-02-18T22:21:00.004-05:00

I came late to the Julie/Julia Project. I didn't even know about it until after it was completed and I saw the book documenting the whole thing on a discount rack in a local bookstore. It's one of many blog-turned-bestseller success stories. This particular one centers around a blog created back in 2002 by Julie Powell. She decided to take Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking and, in her own words:

365 days. 536 recipes. One girl and a crappy outer borough kitchen.

It's an interesting idea and a challenging undertaking - there are a lot of crazy recipes in that book featuring some downright disgusting ingredients and Julie makes every last one of them. I hope to blog more specifically about all this one day soon.

In the meantime, I want to focus on the fact that reading this book inspired me to want to reacquaint myself with the now late, great Julia Child. I remember catching some of her shows on PBS as a child and the Julie/Julia Project resulted in my adding disc 1 of The French Chef with Julia Child from Netflix.

Now, I knew I'd had this disc for a while. Somehow, between all these cable channels we have, Blockbuster movies we rent and the fact that Rick wanted me to watch them 'on my own time' (which is bogus, imho), it took time to get around to it. I just didn't know how long until tonight.

After watching the final two episodes (I convinced Rick to watch them with me and we've been viewing two a night for the past two nights), I decided to get on Netflix and see just how long we've had it on the eve of finally sending it back.

It arrived on October 20...2006.

Unbelievable. No wonder I'm always on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

Laissez Les Bon Temps Roulez

2008-02-03T20:16:00.001-05:00

Well, folks, Mardi Gras comes early this year. It's this Tuesday, February 5th. Celebrate Fat Tuesday by making your own King Cake. I made this recipe a few years back and it was very tasty. Feed me something, mister!

To Do? Try TaDa

2008-01-31T15:10:00.001-05:00

My husband, Rick, is always looking out for me, trying to help me feel less stressed and more organized. So he did some research for me to find a free time sheet application I could use to keep track of my freelance work (more on this in another entry).

It made me think: if this kind of program is available, I bet something exists for online list making. Sure enough, Google "online to do lists" and millions of links pop up. Lazy as I am, I only did minimal research on two. Ta Da List and Remember the Milk.

I've been using Ta Da pretty exclusively because it's so darned easy. So far, I've created 11 lists all in one convenient location. Normally, I'd have at least as many lists scattered about with entries scribbled all over the place. And really, I probably have at least 10 more lists to enter into this account. But for now, it's a good start. I still don't consult the lists ( I have to keep updating the date on my 'to do today no matter what!' list). But I always know where to find the info if I'm looking for it.

From the minimal messing around I did on Remember the Milk, I think this application is probably more useful on a broader level because you can tag items by due date, calendars can be utilized and it seems more customizable on a cursory glance. I haven't had time to explore it more indepth like I want, but it's on my to do list.

Call A Spade A Spade, Dammit

2008-01-21T22:10:00.000-05:00

On more than one occasion, I've unsuccessful searched for rice wine vinegar - it's been listed as an ingredient in several recipes, but I can't find it at my regular grocery store. In the past, I'd use half rice wine and half rice vinegar, thinking this might cover my bases.

A few recipes ago, I decided to look rice wine vinegar up on the internet to see if it actually exists. Lazy as I am, I took the first answer I found at ochef.com as gospel. It's a site that claims to have the answers to life's vexing cooking questions, so I believed the voice of cooking reason when it confidently explained the differences between rice vinegar and rice wine vinegar and wondering how it was possible one couldn't find it at their local grocery store.

Today, I decided to trek out to an Asian supermarket here in town. They had to have it, right? Wrong. Couldn't find it on the shelf anywhere and they had almost a whole aisle dedicated to vinegars of all sorts. I even double checked the shelf stickers to make sure I wasn't missing it because I don't read any 'ese' languages, and some of the products didn't use any English.

Nothing.

So as I was checking out with my other selections, I asked the friendly Asian girl running the register. To her knowledge, rice wine vinegar doesn't exist.

When I got home, I made another, more extensive pass on the Internet. Most 'authorities' agree: rice vinegar and rice wine vinegar are one in the same. Then why the heck are all these recipes calling for rice wine vinegar if it doesn't exist?? What's the point? UGH!

As if I don't have enough aggravations in the kitchen.

No Eggs? No Problem.

2008-01-21T21:40:00.000-05:00

In theory, I had a pretty good idea you could find a substitute for most ingredients. I've had to look up many of these myself as I generally have lots of things on hand I don't need while missing other crucial ingredients.

With that said, I was still extremely surprised to learn you could actually bake cookies without eggs. I found this out on Saturday night when our friends Jean and Andy came over bearing chocolate chip and peanut butter cookies.

Jean didn't have any eggs. She substituted 2 tbsp. flour, 1/2 tbsp. butter, 1/2 tsp. baking powder and 2 tsp. water. The cookies tasted great. They were flat, but delicious just the same. I had never heard of this. Jean had.

She'd also heard of substituting applesauce for an egg. I hadn't. One source I found suggested 1/3 cup of applesauce for each egg; others 1 or 2 tbsp.

Tonight, I was using ground flax seed as part of a coating for tuna (I bought it when I was pregnant and never used it 'til tonight; my son is almost 7 months old) and noticed on the package you can combine 1 tbsp. of it with 3 tbsp. of water to replace an egg (3 tbsp. of it replaces 1 tbsp. of oil - who knew?).

Apparently, you can also use banana, pumpkin, mashed potatoes, tofu and many other crazy items you vegans out there will have heard of. What a wacky world we live in.

So next time you're out of eggs, don't let it stop you from baking something. Jean didn't – and I'm glad.

It's A Two-Peat

2008-01-12T20:58:00.001-05:00

Holy cow, I can't believe it myself, but I've actually made dinner two nights in a row with new recipes involving ingredients I had on hand. Crazy.

Last night, I made Hudson's Baked Tilapia with Dill Sauce, homemade 'Rice-A-Roni' and canned peas. My husband, Rick, bought some tilapia a few weeks ago that he said he'd figure out how to make since I don't really care for tilapia. I'm more of a catfish girl - a southern thing, I know.

Suffice it to say, the fish wasn't going to cook itself, so I did a basic search on allrecipes and there it was. I actually had a lemon that needed to be used anyway and I just substituted dry dill for the fresh stuff. Very good and pretty good for you to boot.

Tonight I whipped up Tonkatsu-Asian Style Pork Chops. I found this on allrecipes as well. You gotta love the ingredient search – I typed in 'pork chops' and 'panko', two ingredients I wanted to use, and found this recipe.

(If you haven't used panko (Japanese bread crumbs) before, you should give them a try. I had some left over in the pantry from making a chicken Parmesan recipe I got while taking at class at The Party Source.)

From reading the reviews, I learned it was missing tonkatsu sauce (funny, since it's in the recipe name, but who am I to question) – apparently a must have for making these chops. So I found one at Recipe Zaar that got high marks. (I split the recipe in half, but it was still way too much for our purposes.)

About 4 minutes before the chops were going to be done, Rick asked me what we were having with it. Oops. I had some corn (a disconnect, I know) heating up in the microwave, but it kind of slipped my mind to make some sort of rice since I was caught up in making the sauce. So I quickly boiled some Ramen noodles from my Avian Bird Flu stash.

And voilá – an Asian-themed dinner.

The chops were crunchy, juicy and tasty. Rick and I ate all four of them tonight - so much for leftovers. The tonkatsu sauce was good, albeit a little reminiscent of A-1 sauce, not one of my favorite condiments, and it gave much-needed flavor to the noodles. All we needed were some fortune cookies. Maybe next time...

All in all, two great nights of relatively healthy, easy to assemble homemade meals. Let's see if I can keep up the good work.

Thank God That's Over

2008-01-12T20:28:00.000-05:00

I don't know about you guys, but, ultimately, I'm glad the holidays are over.

Don't get me wrong. I love Christmas and everything it represents. Jesus. Love. Happiness. Sharing. Cookies. Presents. Pine scent. Ice skating. Colored lights. Hearing from people for the first time all year. And I had high hopes for the 2007 holiday season after the bust 2006 was. But overall, they stunk.

They were stressful. They were disappointing. And they were way out of my control.

I thought for sure I'd have all the time I needed to do my shopping, bake my cookies and get out our Christmas cards. Afterall, I quit my job after my son was born a few months ago.

But here we are, January 12, and I still have 75% of my shopping left to do, I never baked one stinking cookie (that wasn't of the break-and-bake variety to satisfy my sweet tooth), and nary a card was mailed.

A few weeks before Christmas, I was listening to NPR while heading in to my former office to do a little freelance work. It was Science Friday and they had an expert talking about why the holidays are so stressful for some people. I almost ran off the road when I heard (something along the lines of) the following:

Holidays are stressful because people try to do too much without getting enough sleep or exercise, they stuff themselves with a lot of crap and they have unrealistic expectations.

Hello. That's me to a T. The sad part is, I still didn't get anything done (including keeping up with this blog). Better luck next year, I guess.

Perfect For Stuffing

2007-12-15T11:35:00.000-05:00

I'm sitting here, about 8 hours before our holiday party's to begin (provided the 'white death' doesn't prevent all of our guests from venturing out tonight) looking for stocking ideas. Not sure why; I have tons of other stuff that I actually need to get done in the next 8 hours.

But as I was trying to find a clever way to display our Christmas cards before our guests arrive (still haven't, so if you have any ideas, I'm open to them), I stumbled upon a cute stocking idea on marthastewart.com.

Our little darling is on the brink of celebrating his first Christmas, and he has no stocking. My mom knitted my immediate family's and I was hoping she'd do the same initially for my loving husband, and now for our bundle of joy, but apparently, she only has half the instructions.

Suffice it to say, I found this cute idea. Unfortunately, it is extremely unlikely I'll have the time to get on it before St. Nick jumps down our chimney, but I wanted to pass it along in case you did. Happy crafting!

Christmas Cookie Extravaganza

2007-12-02T23:01:00.000-05:00

My old pals over at All Recipes has a whole Christmas cookie section, if you want to check it out. It includes tips and advice and this fun little Christmas Cookie Countdown.

They also mentioned some free downloadable cookbook they've put together with Starbucks, but there was no link. Thanks to the fine folks at organizedchristmas.com (I'll have to check this out in more detail later), you can find it there.

This reminds me of the time I almost had a nervous breakdown making too many cookies for Christmas about four years ago. I'd love to tell you all about it, but it has to be some other time because I'm already about 6 degrees of off task and it's 11 p.m.

Happy baking! And I'd love to hear about some of your favorite recipes.

I Almost Forgot!

2007-11-30T23:16:00.000-05:00

So I'm going through what is now about 1018 emails, and I got one from America's Test Kitchen. It's either a weekly, bi-weekly (I never know if that's the right term or not) or monthly email from the wonderful folks who bring me Cooks Illustrated.

As I'm scanning the topics, the one titled 'How to Grate Ginger' reminds me I never told you guys about my very successful Indian feast I prepared back in October. And how I wanted to tell you that you'll need a lot more ginger than you think - so don't get a small one – and that trying to grate it is like grating a marshmallow, I'd imagine.

So on many levels, this article is timely. It includes the Chicken Masala recipe I was going to have to reenter from the magazine, and there's a handy video that tells you all about a nifty gadget I must now make my own called a...you guessed it, ginger grater. Go figure. They really do make everything, don't they?

Now the video says you can just as successfully use a microplane or the little holes on your mutli-sided grater box, but I tried both and I'm here to tell you – not so easy. But perhaps it can be blamed on the tiny piece of ginger I thought would be big enough. So I'm willing to give them another try.

Meanwhile, if you like Masala, give this recipe a try. It was a big hit, and I didn't have the recommended dutch oven to cook it in. I also made Aloo Phujia, Indian Chickpeas and Basmati rice to go with it. Enjoy!

Open Up A Can Of Elbow Grease

2007-11-28T11:48:00.000-05:00

I spent a large part of my Sunday afternoon and into the evening cleaning our upstairs bathroom. If you've seen our bathroom, you're probably wondering how it's possible. It's not very big. Standard tub, toilet and single vanity. If you're Wilt Chamberlain, you could probably stretch out your arms and touch the walls on either side.

The reason it took me so long is because I really cleaned it. Emptied and wiped down drawers, went through make up containers and threw out stuff I don't use any more or have had since college, dusted the tops of doors and cabinets, washed down the walls – all of them (I've been wanting - and needing - to do this for over a year, at least. Where does all that gradeu come from anyway?), scrubbed the floor on my hands and knees, washed the rugs, cleaned all the built up dust out of the vent. In addition to all the usual stuff, of course, like cleaning the toilet, sink and tub.

Overall, I did a pretty darned thorough job. And not that you would, but you could probably eat in there if you wanted to, it's that clean.

Side Note: Hopefully, you are smarter than me, but in case you're not, here's a friendly piece of advice. When using Tilex or some other harsh chemical in your bathtub, spray the shower head last, not first. I think I got third degree burns on my head when it dripped on me as I was spraying other parts of the shower. Duh.

The True Meaning of Thanksgiving

2007-11-28T10:59:00.001-05:00

One of my birth mom pals is from Mexico and asked us in an email what Thanksgiving was all about. She said that, so far, no one could really explain it to her. I hope I cleared it up:

I think we celebrate the great relationship we created with the Indians when we first got to America, when they taught us about corn and we taught them about green bean casserole, before we stole all their land and stuff.

Shameless Plug

2007-11-22T23:57:00.001-05:00

So this has nothing to do with cooking, cleaning or crafting, but I'm mentioning it anyway. I entered a picture (seen here) in the ivillage 'Show Us Your Belly' competition. So vote for me, please, if you're so inclined. I could use a post-pregnancy wardrobe. Bad. Thanks! And Happy Turkey Day.

Give Thanks For A Sense Of Humor

2007-11-21T22:50:00.001-05:00

Want to impress your guests this Thanksgiving? Then turn your turkey into a sexy little bird with this nifty trick.

Cut out aluminum foil in desired shapes (guess this will depend on how skimpy you want your bikini to be). Arrange the unlucky fowl in your roasting pan. Position the foil carefully; you wouldn't want to mess up this culinary coup de gras.

Then roast according to your own recipe and serve before carving. Then watch the faces of your most beloved friends and family.

It may seem unnecessarily humiliating to the turkey, but it's gone to the great prairie in the sky and won't know the difference. Have fun and Happy Thanksgiving!

A New Thanksgiving Tradition

2007-11-17T11:17:00.000-05:00

My gal pal group, the Glojags, just had our annual Thanksgiving meeting last Tuesday. My friend, Sarah, hosts this event every year and made her usual delicious crock pot turkey breast. (I must ask for this recipe again - every time I have it I swear I'm going to make it on a regular basis it is so darned good, but alas, it has yet to happen.)

She also made one of the yummiest dips I've ever had in my life called Pumpkin Fluff Dip, and I don't generally like pumpkin stuff (except for pumpkin curry soup, pumpkin bread my friend Kristen makes, and the crustless pumpkin pie from Weight Watchers...hmm, maybe I do like pumpkin.). Anyway, this stuff was so fantastic, I couldn't stop eating it. And I ate so much of it, I couldn't even have dessert, which is saying something.

I guess you could say anything with "fluff" in the title is going to be good. And even though it's not made with actual marshmallow fluff, it does have a container of whipped topping in it, which is right up there with cream cheese as a wonder ingredient.

I'm going to bring it to my in-laws on Thursday. I suggest you do the same.

Virtual Clutter

2007-11-17T10:57:00.000-05:00

Just to prove that every aspect of my life is spiraling out of control, I currently have close to 1,000 emails in my inbox. Yes, that's right. One thousand. In the inbox.

Just a couple of weeks ago, I had about 700 emails and that's generally where it would stand. I'd get 100 or so a day that I could work my way through to maintain the 700 mark, but lately, I've been freelancing, so I haven't even been able to do that.

You might ask why 700 would seem like a reasonable number to me, or why I'd have that many at all times anyway. Basically, I could only keep up with new ones or read emails without having a chance to respond. Or, I wouldn't have time to capture information that I'd want to keep from my birth class pals.

What's sad is it took me about two months to congratulate a friend on his wife's pregnancy. And I just remembered that one of my cousins sent me a nice note about a month ago I have yet to respond to.

Back when I only had 700 to go through, my goal was to have my inbox cleaned out by the end of the year. Now I'm not sure it's possible, what with all the other chaos in my life that needs addressing (a spare room full of clothes to be ironed, a dresser full of papers to be sorted, thank you notes to send, a holiday party to plan and decorate for, presents to buy, wrap and mail, Christmas cards to conceive, print and mail, and more freelance work to be done). But I'm going to give it the old college try. Wish me luck.

Note: Holy crap, I just did a google search of 'piles of clutter' for a photo I could use for this blog entry and the number one option was a news story about a woman in Washington state who suffocated under piles of clutter. This shit really can kill you.

Useless Stuff I Own

2007-11-16T23:52:00.000-05:00

This could possibly fall under 'tips' in the category of 'short cuts, tips and tricks', and if I think of some more, maybe I would put them there next time. But for now, this title seemed fitting.

My husband, Rick, often complains that I have every kitchen gadget under the sun. (While that's my dream, it just ain't true.) So I often have to remind him that I use pretty much everything I have, with some degree of frequency. However, lately I've noticed that I do own some things that, if I had the chance to do it over again, I'd have left them on the shelves or off my wish list.

First item: Wilton's 3-in-1 Cake Caddy. I had my eye on this one for a while and, thankfully, I used a 40% off coupon from Michael's to get it, so at least I didn't pay the full $19.99 MSRP. But what a waste of dough this one was.

It seemed like a good idea – it carries cupcakes, both standard and mini, as well as a full size 9 x 13 cake in a big, protective, easy-to-carry plastic dome so you don't mess up your beautiful decorating job. But as I found when I went to transport my adorable mummy cupcakes (hopefully, details on this project before Christmas), it only carries 12 standard cupcakes when a box cake mix makes 24. I've never made mini cupcakes before, but I can only presume you'd make 48 but could only safely transport 24.

In my opinion, you don't need it.

Second item: 6-Sided Box Grater. This was on our wedding gift registry at Williams Sonoma and my friend, Angie, was kind enough to get it for us. Really, 6 is just too many sides. None of them are big enough or easy to handle, I wind up scrapping my knuckles across a side I'm not using while using another side, and most of those shapes you have on other things, like a microplane.

If I had it to do all over again, I'd have ask for one of those one-sided graters that you just hold up. I had one in college that I got at a dollar store and it worked great up until about a year ago when I broke it doing something stupid. (Can't remember the specific action, but I do recall thinking it was stupid at the time.)

Third item: Little Dipper Mini Crock Pot. This one took some searching to find over the course of a couple of years. Mostly, they come along as a freebie when you buy a regular-sized crock pot. So after spending a few bucks on gas driving around this fair city to get my hands on one, I finally got one at either Linens N Things or Bed Bath and Beyond. I'm hoping I used a coupon here, too, because I used it once at our Ornament Exchange Party last year.

I put my beloved Rotel cheese dip in there only to have it burn. There is no temperature setting on there, so you plug it in and get what you get. It's like using sterno - it seems like a given it will burn your stuff, so what's the point of that?

Let me know if you own anything you regret as it pertains to the household.

Boo-Hoo

2007-10-28T22:21:00.000-04:00

Well, here it is, Halloween 2007, and the only decoration I have out is a towel in the bathroom. Pathetic, especially since I made a vow to myself that I would get it all out around the first of the month after waiting until a week before the blessed event last year. I have a couple of boxes worth of stuff in the basement but no will to get it up, so to speak.

I got some new stuff at Illuminations, but didn't want to unpack it until I found out whether or not they would give me some sort of price adjustment since what I got went 75% off the day it arrived. There seemed to be some sort of message on the machine from them today but couldn't understand it and don't see any credits on my bill.

Anyway, I can only hope things will go better next year. But what I lacked in decorating I made up for (sort of) in treats, so I'll share those recipes for you to enjoy in the future.

Muy Delicioso

2007-10-28T22:08:00.000-04:00

Need a quick and easy way to make a good Mexican rice? You'll enjoy this one from allrecipes.com. Rick was going to pick up a box at the store to go with the beef fajitas he was making for dinner, but it didn't make the list. So I did a quick search and found this one that I actually had all the ingredients for.

Sad For Me, Happy For You

2007-10-19T22:44:00.000-04:00

But mostly, sad for me. Got an email from Illuminations today – they've reduced prices on their Halloween wares up to 75%. So if you haven't already ordered and you want to, you can get even more for your money.

Some of us, not so lucky. I'm not even sure why they'd send such an email to someone who has already purchased a few items because it just gets under my skin. I knew I should have waited and I was going to hold out, but last year I waited and waited, and never got the prices I wanted. *sigh*

Anyway, better luck next year.

Scary Savings At Illuminations

2007-10-16T23:59:00.000-04:00

I love decorating for Halloween, though you wouldn't know it by looking around our house. I had big plans to get our Halloween goodies on display the first weekend of October, but it didn't happen. Surprisingly, our house is a mess right now.

Not all of it is completely my fault. We got new furniture, so all the stuff that was shoved into our former, cavernous end and coffee tables is now on our dining room table, a popular area for Halloween decorations. And our new end table hasn't arrived yet, so that precious real estate is not currently available, either.

Suffice it to say, I was planning to dazzle you with all the ghoulishly cool stuff I've collected over the years, a lot of it from my favorite Halloween decorating haunt, Illuminations. Then I was going to tell you about their sale.

But I guess I'll just get to the good stuff. Right now, they're offering 25% off their Halloween stuff and giving $15 off orders of $60 or more pre tax and shipping, which isn't hard to do, when you use the code 999201332. (Hopefully, that code isn't of the single use persuasion. If so, my apologies.)

One of my favorite items is my tea light haunted mansion. They don't carry the exact same one any more, but they do have equally enchanting haunted village pieces. Plus, there are tons of neat candles and candle holders. So check it out. The $15 discount ends October 28, but you'll want to order soon so you can use it this season. Happy shopping!

Don't Try This At Home

2007-10-15T16:19:00.000-04:00

I'm famous for my lists. I make them everywhere. In various notepads. On scraps of paper. Across Post-it notes taped to the front door. One of my guiltiest of note pleasures is writing things I don't want to forget on our bathroom mirror in eyeliner.

This particular habit drives my husband, Rick, crazy. He hates it because it is such a pain in the pratt to get that greasy eyeliner off.

So how excited was I when I read somewhere that you can write on mirrors with those dry erase pens, then just wipe them off. What a fantastic idea! I get to keep writing my little reminders where I'm sure to see them and they'll wipe off easily.

Not so fast. Turns out, the marks look erased to the naked eye, but take a shower, and shadows of all the former notes reappear. Yes, all of them. It's very Stephen King and also very annoying.

Regular old window cleaner does not get it off, nor does kitchen cleaner, but it sure leaves a nice cloudy film on the mirror. Apparently, I'm not the only one who's had this problem, so I've read cyber suggestions to use a baking soda and water paste (could scratch); acetone (heard it doesn't work), and some genius suggested blacking out the whole mirror with the marker, then erasing it. I don't think so.

I've also been told the type of pen makes a difference, which may or may not be true, but it's certainly too late for my purposes. But I will keep trying. And once find a solution (haha) that works, I'll let you know. In the meantime, if you have any ideas on an easy way to leave myself notes that don't create more problems than they fix, I'm all for it.

An Interesting Concept

2007-10-08T21:53:00.000-04:00

My friends over at Working Moms Against Guilt recently blogged about an interesting online meal planning service called emealsforyou. It includes recipes, shopping lists, wine pairings, techniques and ideas. A 6-month membership is $36, so for just $6 a month, you can spend more quality family time at the dinner table minus the hassle of planning it all yourself. And if you use the code on WMAG's site, you'll save $5.

What Is Wrong With People?

2007-10-08T17:29:00.001-04:00

In honor of Columbus sailing the ocean blue back in 1492, my TV has been stuck on the Food Network all day. I caught an episode of Sandra Lee's Semi-Homemade Cooking and was interested in the recipe for Reggie's Sweet Potato Pie. So I looked it up online and was amazed, not for the first time, by how rude people are in their reviews of this poor woman.

Rose from Dallas, who gave the recipe 2 out of 5 stars, wrote: This looks good, but I'm afraid to try it until I see other reviews. Why not fresh sweet potatoes? Did Sandra Lee have to put her own special touch on it?

Now it's God's own mystery how Rose came up with 2 stars for a recipe she didn't even make, but in answer to her question: yeah, Sandra had to put her touch on it because it's her freakin' show – called semi-homemade. As in, everything is not made from scratch, you maroon.

For some reason, Sandra Lee really rubs people the wrong way. The first time I noticed this phenomenon was back in January when I was looking up some of her recipes from her Indian Dinner episode and decided to check out the reviews.

For a minute, I would have sworn I had somehow jumped over to a Jerry Springer chat room. These people were brutal. Taking potshots at other reviewers as well as poor Sandra. And I mean personal insults that were completely and totally uncalled for. I couldn’t believe it.

It’s one thing not to like the recipe but quite another to start talking about people’s broken marriages and drinking problems. Check out these comments for the Chicken Masala (which I thought was pretty good):

Anonymous wrote: Sandra isn't responsible if the people at FN can't spell her recipes. Anybody who has watched her show more than once knows how much she loves the bottle - obviously this is her rendition of Chicken Marsala. After all, even she wouldn't be silly enough to use condensed cream of anything soup in an 'Indian' dish.

A second anonymous reviewer wrote in response: Didn't care for the recipe, 'cause once you've had real authentic Indian food, everything else is just a cheap imitation. And PLEASE MS. Anonymous get your facts straight you Olive- Garden-eatin-ignorant-American Cow, this dish not to be confused with Italian Marsala!!

Tough crowd.

And under the headline "AA Is Waiting For You", another anonymous viewer wrote: Sandy, if you had any integrity to stay true to real ethnic cuisine, not the booze-induced trash you throw together, you would have found that the preferred alcohol libations in Indian cuisine are beer or gin. Vodka and yogurt?? No wonder your husband left to seek more sober pastures. Please Sandy, get some help.

Did I miss an episode of Inside Edition, did Sandra just make a few more than her fair share of enemies in high school, or does she has a pin up calendar these ladies' husbands are spending too much time with out in the garage?

Either way, I’m curious to see if people are so hard on Rachel Ray or Giada De Laurentiis. You can bet your sweet ass no one would take that tone with Paula Deen.

Anyway, I made all of the recipes from this episode, including the Chai Ice Cream – yummy! – and thought they were pretty good. Check them out, if you so desire. But if you don't like the recipes, please direct your comments to the food - not the chef.

What A Bright Idea

2007-10-05T22:58:00.001-04:00

After reading my entry about her kick-ass first birthday party, my friend Kristen provided a link to the recipe she used to make the adorable Flip Flop Cookies.

It was on BrightIdeas.com, the M&M's web site. You can sign up to receive their newsletters full of fun things that generally involve some type of Mars product.

I've been getting them for a couple of years now and while I've never actually made anything from the site yet, I have seen plenty of cute ideas. Including a NASCAR-inspired cake for little race fans and a fun Halloween idea that I went so far as to buy the ingredients for but somehow became too busy to make last year.

Who knows? Maybe this will be my year.

Home Improvement For Ladies Only

2007-10-05T22:06:00.000-04:00

Home Depot offers clinics for women only called Do It Herself Workshops. On Monday, October 22, the topic will be an intro to power tools. You'll learn how to use a variety of saws, drills and other power tools safely and confidently. Class runs 7 - 8:30 p.m. All you have to do is register online.

Texas Governor's Mansion Cowboy Cookies

2007-10-05T17:19:00.000-04:00

I can't remember the first time I had these cookies. Either my mom made them during one of my visits or she brought them to some family function. But they left enough of an impression on me that I knew I would one day want to make them myself. They're big, just like everything in Texas. They're chock full of all your favorite cookie ingredients have in them. And they're so good, even liberals will like them.

If you do decide to rustle up a batch, take my mom's advice: Make sure you use a big bowl –you'll end up using your hands to mix the oats, etc., in.

Take mine first: wash those hands!

Texas Governor's Mansion Cowboy Cookies

3 cups all purpose flour
1T baking powder
1T baking soda
1 T ground cinnamon
1 t salt
1 1/2 cups (3 sticks) butter room temperature
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
1 1/2 cups packed light brown sugar
3 eggs
1 T vanilla
3 cups semi-sweet choc. chips
3 cups old fashioned rolled oats
2 cups sweetened flake coconut
2 cups chopped pecans (8 oz.)

Heat oven to 350˚. Mix flour, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon and salt in bowl. In 8 quart bowl, beat butter on medium speed until smooth and creamy, 1 minute. Gradually beat in sugars; beat to combine, 2 minutes. Add eggs one at a time, beating after each. Beat in vanilla. Stir in flour mixture until just combined. Add chocolate chips, oats, coconut and pecans.

For each cookie, drop 1/4 cup (yes, you read that right) dough onto ungreased baking sheets spacing 3" apart. Bake in 350˚ oven 17-20 minutes until edges are lightly browned; rotate sheets halfway through. Remove cookies to rack to cool.

Yields about 42 cookies.

Note: for 6 dozen smaller cookies, use 2T dough for each. Bake at 350˚ for 15-18minutes.

Useful Tips?

2007-10-03T10:14:00.000-04:00

You'll have to decide that for yourself. Just got this email from a friend and most of these tips sounded interesting enough. The deviled eggs idea intrigues me as my mother-in-law has been requesting I bring these to most family functions (not because they’re so delicious, mind you), and there’s a lot of them.

The cheapskate in me likes the icing idea, though I usually make my own, especially if I’m going to be doing any cake decorating. The broken glass tip doesn’t make sense – if the shards are so small you can’t see them, how is something as tiny as a q-tip going to magically find them?

But I have used conditioner to shave my legs before and I am looking forward to trying the chalkboard eraser trick as well as washing my lint screen. If you have already tried any of these (or do in the near future), let us know how they worked out.

1. Reheat Pizza: Heat up leftover pizza in a nonstick skillet on top of the stove , set heat to med-low and heat till warm. This keeps the crust crispy. No soggy micro pizza. I saw this on the cooking channel and it really works.

2. Easy Deviled Eggs: Put cooked egg yolks in a zip lock bag. Seal , mash till they are all broken up. Add remainder of ingredients , reseal , keep mashing it up mixing thoroughly , cut the tip of the baggy , squeeze mixture into egg. Just throw bag away when done easy clean up.

3. Expanding Frosting : When you buy a container of cake frosting from the store , whip it with your mixer for a few minutes. You can double it in size. You get to frost more cake/cupcakes with the same amount. You also eat less sugar and calories per serving.

4. Reheating refrigerated bread : To warm biscuits , pancakes , or muffins that were refrigerated , place them in a microwave with a cup of water. The increased moisture will keep the food moist and help it reheat faster.

5. Newspaper weeds away: Start putting in your plants, work the nutrients in your soil. Wet newspapers put layers around the plants overlapping as you go cover with mulch and forget about weeds. Weeds will get through some gardening plastic they will not get through wet newspapers .

6. Broken Glass clean up: Use a wet cotton ball or Q-tip to pick up the small shards you can't see easily.

7. No More Mosquitoes: Place a dryer sheet in your pocket. It will keep the mosquitoes away.

8. Squirrel Away: To keep squirrels from eating your plants sprinkle your plants with cayenne pepper. The cayenne pepper doesn't hurt the plant and the squirrels won't come near it.

9. Flexible vacuum nozzle: To get something out of a heat register or under the fridge add an empty paper towel roll or empty gift wrap roll to your vacuum. It can be bent or flattened to get in narrow openings.

10. Reducing Static Cling: Pin a small safety pin to the seam of your slip and you will not have a clingy skirt or dress. Same thing works with slacks that cling when wearing panty hose. Place pin in seam of slacks and -- ta da! -- static is gone.

11. Measuring Cups clean up : Before you pour sticky substances into a measuring cup, fill with hot water. Dump out the hot water, but don't dry cup. Next, add your ingredient, such as peanut butter, and watch how easily it comes right out.

12. Hate foggy windshields?: Buy a chalkboard eraser and keep it in the glove box of your car. When the windows fog, rub with the eraser! Works better than a cloth!

13. Reopening envelope: If you seal an envelope and then realize you forgot to include something inside , just place your sealed envelope in the freezer for an hour or two. Voila! It unseals easily .

14. Hair Conditioner: Use your hair conditioner to shave your legs. It's a lot cheaper than shaving cream and leaves your legs really smooth. It's also a great way to use up the conditioner you bought but didn't like .

15. Goodbye Fruit Flies: To get rid of pesky fruit flies, take a small glass, fill it 1/2" with Apple Cider Vinegar and 2 drops of dish washing liquid , mix well. Those flies will be drawn to the cup and gone forever!

16. Get Rid of Ants: Put small piles of cornmeal where you see ants. They eat it , take it "home", can't digest it so it kills them. It may take a week or so, especially if it rains , but it works & you don't have the worry about pets or small children being harmed!

17. INFO ABOUT CLOTHES DRYERS : The heating unit went out on my dryer! The gentleman that fixes things around the house for us told us that he wanted to show us something and he went over to the dryer and pulled out the lint filter. It was clean. (I always clean the lint from the filter after every load clothes.) He told us that he wanted to show us something; he took the filter over to the sink, ran hot water over it. The lint filter is made of a mesh material - I'm sure you know what your dryer's lint filter looks like. WELL....the hot water just sat on top of the mesh! It didn't go through it at all! He told us that dryer sheets cause a film over that mesh that's what burns out the heating unit. You can't SEE the film , but it's there. It's what is in the dryer sheets to make your clothes soft and static free - that nice fragrance too, you know how they can feel waxy when you take them out of the box, well this stuff builds up on your clothes and on your lint screen. This is also what causes dryer units to catch fire & potentially burn your house down with it! He said the best way to keep your dryer working for a very long time (& to keep your electric bill lower) is to take that filter out & wash it with hot soapy water & an old toothbrush (or other brush) at least every six months. He said that makes the life of the dryer at least twice as long! Note: I went to my dryer & tested my screen by running water on it.! The water ran through a little bit but mostly collected all the water in the mesh screen. I washed it with warm soapy water & a nylon brush & I had it done in 30 seconds. Then when I rinsed it the water ran right thru the screen! There wasn't any puddling at all! That repairman knew what he was talking about!

Never A Pampered Chef Party When You Need One

2007-10-02T23:33:00.000-04:00

Don't you just dread those invitations to the in-home, over-priced parties?

I know I do. It's not that I don't enjoy the socialization and the products, not to mention the snacks. It's just that I want everything and it's all so (generally) outrageously priced.

But now I'm actually jonesing for a Pampered Chef party. When I was making Texas Governor's Mansion Cowboy Cookies the other night, I remembered my chopper was broken. I was reminded the hard way when I went to chop pecans. Apparently, I put it away thinking maybe I could fix it next time.

In a nutshell (haha), it won't come apart anymore so you can't clean it. Big problem, especially when nuts get stuck up in there.

The chopper was purchased at Home Goods for a song - about $6.99. It served its purposed while it lasted and I always thought it did a pretty good job until I was at my sister Sharon's back in March.

I was making Banana Crunch Muffins and used her Pampered Chef version to chop the nuts. Wow. What a difference. Smooth. Fast. Efficient. Everything I didn't realize my Zyliss chopper wasn't.

So now that I'm in the market for a new one, nothing but a Pampered Chef chopper will do – even at $29.95 (choke). Like they say, you get what you pay for. If you're planning a party, you know who to invite.

Back In The Saddle

2007-10-02T23:11:00.001-04:00

Before I got married, I learned how to do things for myself. Considering I didn't tie the knot until I was 34, it seemed like there would be no knight riding by to help me fix the garbage disposal, hang pictures, etc. So I was always figuring out one thing or another.

Plus, back when I lived in Atlanta, my roommate, Mary, was a do-it-yourselfer, so she gave me even more reason to help myself. And this mindset was pretty well in place right up to my wedding day. But the second that ring went on my finger, I went on fix-it-up-strike.

I mean, that's what my loving husband was for, right? Well, not always.

Stubborn as I am, I've been in denial, still thinking that because I'm a wife, it's my God-given right to have my husband fix every leak, lift every heavy object and hammer every nail.

After three years of wedded bliss, I've come to the realization that it ain't necessarily so. So after a week of hemming and hawing, I've finally taken one matter into my own hand.

Thanks to the Great Drought of '07, our house has experienced dramatic settling, causing our front door to become askew. There is a plan in place to get the front of the house jacked up and return everything to its proper place, but in the mean time, I wanted a little extra security.

The estimate I got for installing a chain lock was $141 - are you f'ing kidding me? The lock itself was under $5. Screw that rip off. So I dusted off my utility belt, grabbed my drill and got to work. Yay for me. Hopefully, this is the restart of something beautiful. But Rick, keep that shining armor handy.

My Own Worst Enemy

2007-10-01T23:12:00.000-04:00

So, I have a list of things to do today. I create these often, usually the night before, though it's rare for me to actually consult them until a few weeks later, only to find out I still haven't done most of it.

Today was one of those days where I consulted it off and on, but out of the 15 things I had on my list, I only achieved 6 of them, one of which was putting a 'test beer*' in the fridge. Woo-hoo.

This isn't to say I sat on my ass all day, though based on the fact that Ian and I didn't even get out of bed until 10:45 this morning – just in time to head out sans shower to meet a friend for lunch around 11:45 – that scenario would not have been surprising.

The problem is I make these lists, then proceed to do a bunch of things not on them. For instance, I checked two things off my list on my way home after lunch, then got home and decided to clean up all the leaves on the street in front of our house and on the sidewalk – not on the list. But thanks to the drought, we have the only tree on the block that has shed most of its (tiny, annoying) leaves and I've been feeling guilty about how crappy it looks.

And I had a brilliant plan – I'd use the wet/dry vac to suck them up. I couldn't wait to get started.

Ian went down for a nap (hallelujah), so I figured I'd just put in a load of laundry before heading outside – not on the list. Once I got down to the basement, I noticed the rug in front of the washer and dryer could use a vacuuming, so I did that – not on the list. Then proceeded to clean up around the litter boxes – not on the list. While I was at it, I vacuumed all the floor that wasn't piled high with coal room stuff and the stairs leading up to the kitchen – not on the list.

I made the mistake of looking up and decided to vacuum all the disgusting cobwebs that had reappeared since the last time I did it in early September – not on the list. Miraculously, Ian was still sleeping, so I was able to go outside and take care of the leaves – still not on the list. I even got so far as getting the leaves up from the back stairs and around our back porch – not on the list, either.

Then I took out the garbage and recyclables (the first time in two weeks - good grief!), did some more laundry, took a shower, called a friend, talked to my husband, paid some bills, played with and read to my child, made a crappy dinner for myself and cleaned up yesterday's and today's dishes – not on the list, not on the list, not on the list.

Whew. It was a big day. And while I feel good about what I've done, I don't have that sense of accomplishment that would come with checking off everything that actually was on my list. Tomorrow is another day...

* A cooler full of beer has been on our back porch since Ian's baptism. There were two coolers, but one I could actually lift myself, so that has long since been brought in, its contents put in our basement fridge. This one, however, is heavy and waiting on Rick. So I thought I'd try one of the beers to make sure they're not skunked before bothering to unload them, provided Rick does, one day, bring in the cooler. Thus the 'test beer.' Exciting, eh?

A Love/Hate Relationship

2007-09-30T21:02:00.000-04:00

The first time I ever saw Martha Stewart, she was in a TV spot for American Express, tiling her pool with other banks' cut up credit cards about 10 years ago. At the time, I didn't know who she was, but it wasn't long after this commercial that I caught her show for the first time.

Immediately, I knew she was spawn of the devil, long before she went to the slammer. I mean, who has the time or the inclination to fashion their own place mats for a dinner party out of twigs? Give me a freakin' break. As if women don't feel inadequate enough as it is.

As a matter of fact, Martha was a big inspiration for this blog. To kind of show the average woman she's not alone. We all don't have a team of 25 working behind the scenes to make our crafts, cooking and entertaining look so effortless. Screw you, Martha.

But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't enthralled with the woman and her craftiness. I've bought her magazines a time or two, and I've kept them for future reference. I've visited her web site for wedding and other event ideas. I've tuned into her show as recently as last Monday.

My most recent foray to the dark side was purchasing her Halloween edition Holiday magazine while visiting my parents. How could I resist? I'm a Halloween fanatic and she used one of my most favorite printing tricks - the flip book. One side of the magazine shows her dressed as a goddess and boasts 150 good things (and bad things, too). Flip it over and she's a witch advertising 150 bad things (and good things, too). How clever!

As you can imagine, the squeaky clean side emphasizes the lighter side of Halloween; the dark side highlights the spookier aspects. Pure genius! And both sides have tons of ideas for decorating, entertaining and stuffing your face, a few of which I plan to try this season. Watch this space for the gory details.

In the meantime, check out her web site. There are even more adorable ideas there (some I'd even call easy), including how-to videos. And tune in to her Fine Living Halloween special called Bad Things, Good Things every Saturday at 2 p.m. ET.